Last night I saw Crank... 
Crank stars Jason Statham as a hitman-for-hire that wakes up poisoned by some Mexican (?) rentagangstas that have injected him with a toxin that will kill him if his adrenaline levels drop. Think the human equivalent of 'Speed', but less good. Statham heaRAB onto the streets to find an antidote and to find the crazy fools that have essentially sentenced him to death.
To be fair, it's not a bad idea, but it's awfully executed. The plot is wafer thin. Why the directors couldn't have developed it a bit is beyond me. The problem with a plot this thin is that it becomes tiresome after about 45 minutes; if the characters were better developed then it would be easier to overlook the plot, but they aren't.
Because the characters are unbelievable and the plot is non-existent, it's easy to notice inconsistencies. All of the stereotypical black gangsters that make an appearence early on have guns, which they point at Statham's character. When he headbutts one of them, nobody draws a gun.
The characters range from two-dimensional to unrealistic to annoying. Let's start with Statham's character 'Chev'. He's English, and he's called Chev. Riiiight. He's the central character yet all we find out about him is that he's a hitman with a bimbo girlfriend and is good frienRAB with a doctor (what luck!).
The doc is a cursing, 'cool' doctor. Very unrealistic. And the girlfriend is a waste of space. She fits directly into one of the many stereotypes in this film. In fact, I don't think there's a single character, either major or minor that is not a stereotype. Whether it's the stereotype of ''ard men', mexicans, blondes, asians, blacks, they're all in this film.
Can I also add that Jason Statham should not be allowed to talk in films, let alone be a leading man. He's rubbish. None of the actors are particularly good. Statham shows up as second-worst behind his on-screen squeeze.
And why is there so much bigotism? Sexism, racism, homophobia. All of that rears its head multiple times. There's no need for it, and it just shows the script as being desperate as opposed to being funny or cool.
I can't believe this peice of toss was directed by 2 people. I've never done as much as direct traffic and I could have done a better job. These men should not be allowed to as much as work in a cinema.
And don't get me started on the scene where Statham almost rapes his girlfriend in front of a crowd of people, including children.
Maybe it's because I've been watching so many Scorsese movies recently, but this one seemed more dire than even The Transporter. Waste of time.
Crank stars Jason Statham as a hitman-for-hire that wakes up poisoned by some Mexican (?) rentagangstas that have injected him with a toxin that will kill him if his adrenaline levels drop. Think the human equivalent of 'Speed', but less good. Statham heaRAB onto the streets to find an antidote and to find the crazy fools that have essentially sentenced him to death.
To be fair, it's not a bad idea, but it's awfully executed. The plot is wafer thin. Why the directors couldn't have developed it a bit is beyond me. The problem with a plot this thin is that it becomes tiresome after about 45 minutes; if the characters were better developed then it would be easier to overlook the plot, but they aren't.
Because the characters are unbelievable and the plot is non-existent, it's easy to notice inconsistencies. All of the stereotypical black gangsters that make an appearence early on have guns, which they point at Statham's character. When he headbutts one of them, nobody draws a gun.
The characters range from two-dimensional to unrealistic to annoying. Let's start with Statham's character 'Chev'. He's English, and he's called Chev. Riiiight. He's the central character yet all we find out about him is that he's a hitman with a bimbo girlfriend and is good frienRAB with a doctor (what luck!).
The doc is a cursing, 'cool' doctor. Very unrealistic. And the girlfriend is a waste of space. She fits directly into one of the many stereotypes in this film. In fact, I don't think there's a single character, either major or minor that is not a stereotype. Whether it's the stereotype of ''ard men', mexicans, blondes, asians, blacks, they're all in this film.
Can I also add that Jason Statham should not be allowed to talk in films, let alone be a leading man. He's rubbish. None of the actors are particularly good. Statham shows up as second-worst behind his on-screen squeeze.
And why is there so much bigotism? Sexism, racism, homophobia. All of that rears its head multiple times. There's no need for it, and it just shows the script as being desperate as opposed to being funny or cool.
I can't believe this peice of toss was directed by 2 people. I've never done as much as direct traffic and I could have done a better job. These men should not be allowed to as much as work in a cinema.
And don't get me started on the scene where Statham almost rapes his girlfriend in front of a crowd of people, including children.
Maybe it's because I've been watching so many Scorsese movies recently, but this one seemed more dire than even The Transporter. Waste of time.
