...marriage if it was just a fling? I was happily married for 13 years, since the age of 18, to a man who was 24. We are now 31 and 38 respectively so have grown together majorly.
We had a lovely marriage - no kids - until 2008. He met a woman at work, and to cut a long story short they dated for over a year. Apparently it was serious and all his friends - even some of his family! - knew about her. He paraded her around and referred to her as his girlfriend. I was the last to know.
When I found out in 2009, he begged me not to leave, and we carried on. I was deeply hurt but felt it right and easier to blame HER - she knew he was married. She contacted me to beg me to believe her that he had told her the marriage was dead and done - but I hung up on her and told her I'd get the cops on her.
We carried on but in the back of my mind, I could not get over that they had dated for SO long. Deep down I know he loved her, because I saw his messages to her, and they were out of this world - these two really seemed to have a connection, and it seemed he would do anything for her. He probably didn't leave me for her only because I threatened suicide, in fact.
In Jan this year I finally filed for divorce, even though we were going into the 2nd year of me finding out about the affair. I just could not live with him anymore. We are selling the house.
To my absolute horror, I have found out that he's gone running back to her - and really persistently. She was the first person he ran to and could not wait to tell her he's soon to be single. I gather she has told him that she'll only be with him if he's serious (no F*** buddies). Apparently he is all over her and waits outside her work for her everyday, and they talk on the phone all the time.
What the hell is he doing going back to her, when he SWORE to me when I discovered the affair that he didn't have any feelings for her?
@Jacqueline Hang - he isn't cheating on me - we're nearly officially divorced and have been living apart for 4 months. I am just trying to make sense of all this.
We had a lovely marriage - no kids - until 2008. He met a woman at work, and to cut a long story short they dated for over a year. Apparently it was serious and all his friends - even some of his family! - knew about her. He paraded her around and referred to her as his girlfriend. I was the last to know.
When I found out in 2009, he begged me not to leave, and we carried on. I was deeply hurt but felt it right and easier to blame HER - she knew he was married. She contacted me to beg me to believe her that he had told her the marriage was dead and done - but I hung up on her and told her I'd get the cops on her.
We carried on but in the back of my mind, I could not get over that they had dated for SO long. Deep down I know he loved her, because I saw his messages to her, and they were out of this world - these two really seemed to have a connection, and it seemed he would do anything for her. He probably didn't leave me for her only because I threatened suicide, in fact.
In Jan this year I finally filed for divorce, even though we were going into the 2nd year of me finding out about the affair. I just could not live with him anymore. We are selling the house.
To my absolute horror, I have found out that he's gone running back to her - and really persistently. She was the first person he ran to and could not wait to tell her he's soon to be single. I gather she has told him that she'll only be with him if he's serious (no F*** buddies). Apparently he is all over her and waits outside her work for her everyday, and they talk on the phone all the time.
What the hell is he doing going back to her, when he SWORE to me when I discovered the affair that he didn't have any feelings for her?
@Jacqueline Hang - he isn't cheating on me - we're nearly officially divorced and have been living apart for 4 months. I am just trying to make sense of all this.