why do me and my girlfriend always argue?

[Nick]

ok heres the situation. we are both very fragile and get offended over things being said with an "attitude". but heres the issue. when i give her an attitude she calls me out on it and says she cant deal with the way i talk to her. i apologize and tell her i didnt mean to give her an attitude and that im not mad and dont want to argue. it usually goes on for quite some time because of her going on about the "way i talk to her". but when she gives me an attitude for dumb things (which belive me she does), she starts saying that she literally did nothing and im crazy and gets mad at me for "picking a fight". and i end up apologizing in the end. im dont want to be the type that gets walked all over and be in a one sided relationship but we really love eachother and when its all over we regret fighting and agree its all over dumb stuff. usually in order for it to end good i literally have to get to the point where i snap, grab her by the hair pin her and forceablly kiss her and have make up sex. she tells me she wants me to be aggresive like that to put her in her place when we argue, so dont worry im not abusive. its just the only way sometimes. but still we hate arguing and how can i stop from being in situations where we both do the same things but im the wrong one. i just want this one to last this one is different please help.