Sebastien Leblanc
New member
I'm living with my roommate for close to a year now. At first our friendship picked off really strong and I thought I've finally found my best friend for life. He used to be so much fun to hang around with and it was so easy being friends.
I found out a few months into our friendship that he took a lot of my attitudes and actions as signs of romantic behavior instead of seeing it as my easy-going and don't care too much about the small stuff character. I came to realize that he was either flirting with me all these last few months or I was just plain crazy drunk with desire and interpreted it wrong. So we talked about it and he made it clear he's not interested.
But the flirting seemed to continue and so I told him I had a crush on him. He told me he didn't want the story to grow between us, that he would now become more uncomfortable and couldn't do the same activities as before. I took this as my sign that I really was the one in the wrong, interpreting his flirting signs as an illusion.
I'm not sure how, but I'm back to where I was before. He now confessed he is bi-curious, but would only do it with another girl present. I'm bi and so that's good with me, if it's something that interest him.
Now, I'm slowly dying inside. On the one hand, I wanted to be best friends with this guy, but got lost in this game of trying to prove to him that's all I really wanted to be and there was nothing more. Now I don't know anymore where I stand. He feels like the perfect guy for me, but he doesn't tread me like the perfect guy. He's only bi-curious anyways. And me I'm burning with desire for him, but I tried talking to him about sex as I need to know what I'm getting myself into, but I was too sheepish doing it and his reply was I'm not interested in trying with you. This really confuses me as I want to try really bad, but I'm too afraid that if I do the first move, then he will turn around and blame me for trying something he's not interested in.
I feel like he's in the control seat, deciding when, how far, etc... But I'm also afraid if I back off, he might reject me altogether and stopped being my friend. I guess what I'm really afraid of is that it feels so good living at home with this guy that it would be just so much more fun to also get to play with him, but it would be real nightmare if I fall for him or him for me or he gets all uncomfortable around me afterwards
I found out a few months into our friendship that he took a lot of my attitudes and actions as signs of romantic behavior instead of seeing it as my easy-going and don't care too much about the small stuff character. I came to realize that he was either flirting with me all these last few months or I was just plain crazy drunk with desire and interpreted it wrong. So we talked about it and he made it clear he's not interested.
But the flirting seemed to continue and so I told him I had a crush on him. He told me he didn't want the story to grow between us, that he would now become more uncomfortable and couldn't do the same activities as before. I took this as my sign that I really was the one in the wrong, interpreting his flirting signs as an illusion.
I'm not sure how, but I'm back to where I was before. He now confessed he is bi-curious, but would only do it with another girl present. I'm bi and so that's good with me, if it's something that interest him.
Now, I'm slowly dying inside. On the one hand, I wanted to be best friends with this guy, but got lost in this game of trying to prove to him that's all I really wanted to be and there was nothing more. Now I don't know anymore where I stand. He feels like the perfect guy for me, but he doesn't tread me like the perfect guy. He's only bi-curious anyways. And me I'm burning with desire for him, but I tried talking to him about sex as I need to know what I'm getting myself into, but I was too sheepish doing it and his reply was I'm not interested in trying with you. This really confuses me as I want to try really bad, but I'm too afraid that if I do the first move, then he will turn around and blame me for trying something he's not interested in.
I feel like he's in the control seat, deciding when, how far, etc... But I'm also afraid if I back off, he might reject me altogether and stopped being my friend. I guess what I'm really afraid of is that it feels so good living at home with this guy that it would be just so much more fun to also get to play with him, but it would be real nightmare if I fall for him or him for me or he gets all uncomfortable around me afterwards