What train of thought am I supposed to have in order to be spiritual?

[jhirl]

I have been attending 12 step meetings for about 5 years now on and off. More off than on. I recently became sober again from a heroin addiction. When I first started attending these meetings I really didn't pay attention to the suggestion that the program offers. I was in and out of meetings and using. These last couple of years I have really started paying attention to things. Especially the spiritual part of the program. Even though I still have been back and forth using, I still manage to try and get back on my feet again. Everything is very cloudy in the beginning stages of early sobriety. There is also depression, anxiety, no motivation e.t.c.. I keep trying to find the right train of thought to get through this. I use to just try and concentrate on work and going back to school and all those things because thats what I worried about all of the time. Now I feel so upset sometimes that I have learned to turn to God, and it works. I just find myself not concentrating on the other part of my life like I use to do. I want to go back to the motivated person that I use to be but Im not sure if I will be able to. The thing that use to motivate me was worrying about things that I didn't have because of the worry I got off my but and did something about it. Now I dont even know if I am supposed to be happy with anything other than Gods free will and appreciating the little things in life. I know that if I concentrate on bettering myself financially it will make me happy so I'm not sure if thats the right mindset for a spiritual foundation. shouldnt I be happy weather life is going good or not?.