They do go through this shit. I know some people who were in orphanage, and they were miserable. Some of them were basically only adopted in order to do work around the house. You have no idea just because you made that decision.
Go talk to people who lived in Orphanages until they came of age, and see what they would have rather had... To not have been born, or to have gone through the shit they went through.
Oh, and sure some of the kids made it out happy when they were adopted, but there are also those who are still miserable.
You and your "Manning up" doesn't actually help, because not everyone mans up.