Fdde Retrd
New member
Ok so I am a lesbian in love with friend who knows it and actually lead me on at the beginning of friendship hardcore and then decided that she wants to settle down with a guy but I never changed my views on her. She admits she doesn't no what she wants but at no stage has she admitted to feeling the same way about me. I guess she is still giving hints she is interested which is really confusing and hurtful especially texting me non stop at 5am etc and telling me I'm her rock. Also she never talks to me about guys she always hides it etc which annoys me like why lie. She treats me like a partner in one sense talking about all the future adventures we are going on together overseas etc not mentioning her bf yet I don't get what I need out of the relationship. She said she is single atm and ever since she became single our friendship has been getting stronger back to the way it was at first. She says things like 'youre not going there without me'. I have no doubt she would also want to be put first when I get a gf but that's the point I can't move on I think she wants to make me think we have something special so I can be wrapped around her little finger. She says I am her rock and that I am the only real friend in her life but yet when we had the recent fallout she said she doesn't give a **** because she has plenty of friends (even though I know it's not true) I guess I feel as if am meeting all her emotional needs whilst the men reap the benefits of it all. I feel if I leave the picture for a while then maybe she will realise what is missing! It's real sad because I hate feeling like this I think about her every moment but I know as soon as I give in I will be weak to her again. We didn't speak for 2 months once and she came crawling back saying she realises what I meant to her then and that she can't lose me again. I think it will be easier if she doesn't that way I will know she doesn't care.