I've been engaged since November 1st of '09 and living with my finace since December. He has two girls 9 and 11, and I have a son that's 10. Both the kids and he have extremely busy schedules. We're up at six, hustling and bustling ALL day and night, and we all don't get to bed until 10:30ish...We're completely pooped by then.
We all live together, but I feel such a disconnect from my fiance. He used to be all over me with the kisses and the hugs in the morning when we wake up or when i'm standing in the kitchen making breakfast or dinner or when he greats me at home I used to get a big squeeze and a more affectionate kiss. Now it's just "hey Honey"...quick kiss on the cheek (and not a lips to cheek kiss, its a cheek to cheek kiss). We used to try to have sex every night. Now I'm lucky that I got any this past Friday night. Just this morning...he used to wake up, find me in bed and give me hugs and kisses and say good morning...now it's like I just get up make breakfast and he and I just walk past each other like we're strangers. I crave intimacy and affection. that was something that he and i both shared with each other throughout our relationship...and now...it feels like it's completely dissipating.
I've tried to talk to him about this...he'll tell me, "I know, I know...I need to get my girls to bed earlier so that I could get to bed earlier..." does it happen? no. He allows them to be up until 11...then he comes to bed, head hits the pillow and we exchange a couple words...then ZZZzzzzzz.
I miss my fiance. I miss our relationship, and I don't know what to do about it. He also keeps telling me,..."in a few years all or our kids won't even want to be around us anymore. they'll be teenagers, and we'll have all the time in the world to ourselves"...he's right, but until then: i'm supposed to live with this feeling of lack in the love and intimacy department? what if we don't like each other anymore by then, because we've failed to connect with each other all this time?
Please let me know your community thoughts.
We all live together, but I feel such a disconnect from my fiance. He used to be all over me with the kisses and the hugs in the morning when we wake up or when i'm standing in the kitchen making breakfast or dinner or when he greats me at home I used to get a big squeeze and a more affectionate kiss. Now it's just "hey Honey"...quick kiss on the cheek (and not a lips to cheek kiss, its a cheek to cheek kiss). We used to try to have sex every night. Now I'm lucky that I got any this past Friday night. Just this morning...he used to wake up, find me in bed and give me hugs and kisses and say good morning...now it's like I just get up make breakfast and he and I just walk past each other like we're strangers. I crave intimacy and affection. that was something that he and i both shared with each other throughout our relationship...and now...it feels like it's completely dissipating.
I've tried to talk to him about this...he'll tell me, "I know, I know...I need to get my girls to bed earlier so that I could get to bed earlier..." does it happen? no. He allows them to be up until 11...then he comes to bed, head hits the pillow and we exchange a couple words...then ZZZzzzzzz.
I miss my fiance. I miss our relationship, and I don't know what to do about it. He also keeps telling me,..."in a few years all or our kids won't even want to be around us anymore. they'll be teenagers, and we'll have all the time in the world to ourselves"...he's right, but until then: i'm supposed to live with this feeling of lack in the love and intimacy department? what if we don't like each other anymore by then, because we've failed to connect with each other all this time?
Please let me know your community thoughts.