what do you think of this small lyric i wrote?

[tough guy]

looked at the gun today just to scare myself away.
picked up the gun today just to scare myself away.
loaded the gun today just to scare myself away.
truly i scared myself today. i could not scare myself away.

 

[goofy]

depends on music

 

[smalltownsoutherngal]

sorry but i dont like it at all...dont get me wrong really powerful lyrics..but my friend commited suicide that way

 

[dolce]

I think they're really great, actually.

 

[Juan S]

ehhhh i think you could do better

 

[bunny wabbit]

Very strong and meaningful lyrics and it's kind of scary as well. It's the kind of thing, you either love it or hate it. I keep switching.

 

[Tenzin]

it's depressing
but i like it!