What do you think of this poetry I wrote? (i'm 14)?

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?Midnight Vampiress?™

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I seek a red glow in your eyes.
A glow from the fire which emits from your heart.
You can barely control yourself, your body is burning from the inside.
Then you see it, you see the light, the demon inside your body is taking control of you.
You have nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. You either kill or be killed.
The knife besides you, waiting to pierce through your burning soul, to kill the demon within.
You become delusional, your mind is racing with fear.
Panic sets in, this is your last chance, you must make your choice now.
You pick up the knife, but it's already too late.
The demon has burned you to mere ashes.
A scream emits from within your body, but soon fades.
As the knife drops besides your remains, of what was once you.
sorry if it creeps anyone out, lol
hmmm...disturbing? It's just a poem, jeez (:
oh my god...NO! I'm not emo. I don't even look emo. I just like writing poetry.
 
i think its really good. parts of it are kinda repetitive but not too much. i write poetry too but i don't really like too show people. maybe next time i write one ill post it on here. by the way, my poems are kinda creepy too.
 
Im 15 and in tenth grade and I jus finished my creative writing class and we write poems EVERY SINGLE DAY n there and they have to be almost perfect or we have to rewrite them. My teacher for that class would love that. U r very good at writing & dont let anyone discourage u
 
o my, did the book BREAKING DAWN inspire u 4 this. sry, this is kinda creepy.
r u emo?
anyway i think the poem is a bit repetitive with the part about the "demon with in you".
besides that, it think the poem, tho its kinda creepy, is pretty good
 
It's not my type of poetry,
but don't post your pieces of work on here 'cause someone could just copy and paste it without u knowing and make money out of it
 
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