K
KawaiiCutie
Guest
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*CRASH*
What’s was that?
The leaves unwillingly trail against the sidewalk,
Dragged by the wind.
Something’s not right.
The Shadow’s loom over me,
A shade darker every second.
That’s not normal
The unbearable silence is threatening
Forcing me to think for myself
It’s never been like this before
I run as fast as I can
To only end up nowhere
Not being able to know
About anything that’s happening to me,
Buries me into and even darker darkness
I hear it.
The crackling laughter
It creeps closer, and closer…
I guess I should have been more careful
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rate 1-10 please (1 being horrible to 10 being AWESOMENESS)
What do you think of it?
What do you think I should change?
I'm more so concerned about the punctuation since I have no idea where to put the comma's and period's
How can I improve?
I think it's a bit fast paced now that I've read it over >_<
That's why I asked where to put the commas and periods in the first place
Then again It was gloomy and raining when I wrote this so everything seemed slow then
Oh! And also what could be a good title for it? I always suck at titles ha ha
*CRASH*
What’s was that?
The leaves unwillingly trail against the sidewalk,
Dragged by the wind.
Something’s not right.
The Shadow’s loom over me,
A shade darker every second.
That’s not normal
The unbearable silence is threatening
Forcing me to think for myself
It’s never been like this before
I run as fast as I can
To only end up nowhere
Not being able to know
About anything that’s happening to me,
Buries me into and even darker darkness
I hear it.
The crackling laughter
It creeps closer, and closer…
I guess I should have been more careful
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rate 1-10 please (1 being horrible to 10 being AWESOMENESS)
What do you think of it?
What do you think I should change?
I'm more so concerned about the punctuation since I have no idea where to put the comma's and period's
How can I improve?
I think it's a bit fast paced now that I've read it over >_<
That's why I asked where to put the commas and periods in the first place
Then again It was gloomy and raining when I wrote this so everything seemed slow then
Oh! And also what could be a good title for it? I always suck at titles ha ha