Please tell me if I you find any figurative language such as similies, metaphors, personification, etc. Also if you think you have better lines, Please do tell
Thanks
Also rate the poem out of 10
When I close my eyes, I still see the transparent blue sky
As I gaze at the flocks of birds fly As if there was no tomorrow (Hyperbole)
I see clouds moving at a smooth pace
As I watch them carefully seeing if they make a face
When I take a breath, I still smell the wonderful aroma of the plants
As their magnificent scent approach towards me
I can also smell the astonishing fragrance of the herbs,
This did not disturb
When I open my mouth, I still taste the fresh water dripping from the leaf of a tree
It taste sugary but tart at a tolerable degree (Oxymoron)
I still taste the bitterness of all the trees
As I lick away all of the annoying flees
When I move my hands, I still touch the wet cool coarse, diminutive green grass
As I watch it absorb the carbon monoxide gas
I feel the vibrations of the trees moving their branches
And screaming to leave the land like a herd of bulls leaving there ranches
I still feel the bug squished under me
And I feel their soaring tear crushed because of me
When I listen closely, I still hear the echoes from the trees
As they whistle a tune with their branches
I can hear the birds chirping a soft solemn tune
And I think I’m going to join them soon.
Also tell me if u have a title for this poem too!
Thanks
Thanks
Also rate the poem out of 10
When I close my eyes, I still see the transparent blue sky
As I gaze at the flocks of birds fly As if there was no tomorrow (Hyperbole)
I see clouds moving at a smooth pace
As I watch them carefully seeing if they make a face
When I take a breath, I still smell the wonderful aroma of the plants
As their magnificent scent approach towards me
I can also smell the astonishing fragrance of the herbs,
This did not disturb
When I open my mouth, I still taste the fresh water dripping from the leaf of a tree
It taste sugary but tart at a tolerable degree (Oxymoron)
I still taste the bitterness of all the trees
As I lick away all of the annoying flees
When I move my hands, I still touch the wet cool coarse, diminutive green grass
As I watch it absorb the carbon monoxide gas
I feel the vibrations of the trees moving their branches
And screaming to leave the land like a herd of bulls leaving there ranches
I still feel the bug squished under me
And I feel their soaring tear crushed because of me
When I listen closely, I still hear the echoes from the trees
As they whistle a tune with their branches
I can hear the birds chirping a soft solemn tune
And I think I’m going to join them soon.
Also tell me if u have a title for this poem too!
Thanks