What do you think of this poem?

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Toshirou_Hitsugaya

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I was suppose to write this poem with metaphors in it.So tell me if you can see and metaphors.Is this poem cheesy?If you want rate my poem from (horrible)1-10(excellent) too.

I Don't Need You Anymore

You're all that I think about.
Always on my mind,
Appearing in my dreams.
How I wish this life of mine would recline.

When you left me,
An arrow shot through my heart.
Tell me what I did baby,
I can't take this pain anymore.

My world is raining without you.
What happened to the times,
When I was your star,
And you were my moon.

I try to start time again,
To forget all this pain you put me through.
Who thought I'd be so wrong when I said,
"In my heart there's only room for you.

Now you come and ask for me back,
After shattering my heart.
You say you still haven't gotten over me,
But I'm already going to that distant sea...

I don't need you anymore,
Don't need you in my life no more,
I don't want to see you anymore,
'Cause I've found someone, to save me, from your downpour.
 
It's kind of amateur-ish and cliche. But I think it'd be better as a song, if you add a little bit more rhythm to it.

As a poet, myself, I believe that creative imagery should be used. As a reader, you should add more emotion, more adjectives. Poetry is, in fact, an image painted in words.
 
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