What do you think of my poem?

D

Daren

New member
When I get old

Is it true that when I get old I could loose my hair and go bald?
I have also been told that my hair could turn silver but why not bronze or gold?
Will I get wrinkles on my skin, will my body get fat or thin?
I like all of my teeth. I don’t want to lose them to the midnight thief
Will my legs slow down to a snails pace, I can’t imagine not winning a running race
I hope I can still hear the church bells ring. I do so like to sing
Today I watch that clock on the wall. Time effects us all.
Until there is no more.


By Daren Walker 25 June 2011
 
Personally I find it a bit boring, but I wouldn't write it off completely. It's a bit unoriginal, but a nice theme. Maybe try to find your own style by bending the rules a bit. Try writing some haikus, they are very inspiring.
 
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