What do you think of my blurb? Would you read it? Supernatural thriller!

N

No I Don't Believe We've

New member
Constructive criticism? THIS IS FOR A BOOK!
I DON NOT BELIEVE IN WEREWOLVES, VAMPIRES OR ANY OTHER SUPERNATURAL BEING.

Ok, this is my Synopsis:
(It's my 1st draft - I'm changing it up all the time)

19-year-old Amy Sparrow can see the future - horrible visions of gruesome crimes.

When she starts to have vision of missing local woman she feels inclined to help.
But how?
She can hardly go up to the local police and say:
"Hey, I know where the women are. See, I kinda had a vision of their deaths', and now I know where they're buried. So if you'd just follow me..."
That would guarantee her a one-way ticket to a mental hospital for the criminally insane.


As her visions grow stronger she follows them to an not-so abandoned warehouse. Where she discovers her fighting ability isn't as excellent as she first thought. After being kidnapped and thrown into a glorified cell with other supernaturals' she soon discovers her world will spirals out of control.
Her abductor -supernatural black market dealer- holds an auction to sell his captives to the highest bidder, Amy has no choice but to go. She will, however, do everything in her power to escape - dead or alive.

Be honest but nice!
I'm aiming for adult readers (with all the sex scenes)
What do you think of the plot?
It's OK to say it's crap.
---
If you don't like supernatural books, films please leave, I don't need you telling me that it sucks only because you hate twilight... blah blah blah.....
 
Here is your 'honest and nice' response:

The best writing is from emotion and experience. It sounds too much like you are trying to craft something along the lines for the 'flavor of the month'.

I would give you this advice: Try to impress yourself. If you are able to, and without a shadow-of-a-doubt be able to say, THIS would make anyone reading it CRY, or LAUGH ALOUD, or FEEL PITY, etc, then you will get to where you shall need no critic.

Also, prance around with different works first. Maybe not let anyone read them at all. Maybe not even save them - do it for the art's sake. Then decide if you want to do some writing to let others partake of.
 
i thought it sounded a bit buffy the slayer
her fighting skills are not as good as she thought

i think you need something that is completely your idea
 
Back
Top