What do I do if I'm afraid of first sex, male?

A

Artur

New member
Ok, here it goes..I've just turned 23 and somehow I've never had sex. Recently I had kind of a date with a girl, we watched movies hugging all the night through, we lay together hugging, I even kissed her.. well she was at my full disposal, but I didn't do it. I was too afraid, so afraid that I didn't even have an errection while touching her. So basically I'm afraid of sex itself (it's psychological i guess) and afraid that i might not function if you know what i mean (because I know it happens to many guys). What do I do when we meet next time because she really expected me to be much more active?
 
Do you watch porn? You can learn ALOT of things from porn. But of course, you need to apply it in real life and not get sucked into it in your basement all day. Also, start reading men's magazines, they give you (and even females) alot of tips.

Personally, I'd advice you to relax first and foremost. Think about things like getting an erection LATER. Put your concerns aside, because sex doesn't have to be perfect...it should be natural. Make the sexual tension gradual. There are many ways to do this. Set up some candles. Have a glass of wine. Give each other a massage. Simple things like that can go a long way.
 
You're so afraid you won't function, that you can't function. Actually some males do get so nervous they can't function (or function well) but they are not the majority...and usually when they relax and have another go at it, all is well.

If this is an issue for you, you either need to stop worrying so much and go with the flow or seek counseling to find out what you really fear about it. Although you should use protection (and so should your partner) sex is the most natural thing in the world...nothing to fear but the possible consequences and if you are using protection, and have your own health insurance in case it fails, then you'll be fine.
 
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