We love each other very much, but we argue of fruitless things!!?

  • Thread starter Thread starter GirlofURdreams
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GirlofURdreams

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I have been with my now boyfriend for about 14 months. We live together and have been for the last 8 months. I can say that he is everything I have ever wanted in a man, he is funny, cute, compasionate and well he loves me back. I know that sometimes we like to bicker. We both take our feelings very seriously. Alot of times we end up fighting over little things and bicker for hours just to find that we have been doing it for no reason. We both want to be right, and we both fear losing each other. So alot of times one of us ends up upset at the thought of us breaking up. I know that I cannot live without him, and he says the same thing. but we are sick of bickering over small stuff. How can we argue affectively without making a big deal? We are 24, and 26. I have two sons from a previous marriage that he is very good to, I have them fifty fifty....He is just like me! We love the same things and want each other to stay healthy and happy.......we talk about marriage and children as well. I know that I want this to work, so I just need help..............
 
my husband and i use to have that problem. the best thing we started doing is try and see the other's point of view. i know thats easier said than done, but if you need to go to another room for a few minutes sit alone and think about the fight. think to yourself "is this really worth getting this upset over?, would i be upset if i was in his shoes?"then after a few minutes go find him then start talking about it again. when your fighting in the heat of the moment you say pointless things that doesnt help the conversation. time between fights is good, however don't leave the house overnight. just give it alittle time to set in and to calm yourself. also pick your battles. dont get upset because he didn't pick up his dishes, but do get mad at him if stays out really late getting drunk with friends. just think about what your fighting about and keep a clear head while arguing
 
Step back and ask yourself is this worth fighting over and usually it isn't. Don't sweat the small stuff. You both are still young and probably very immature (most people are in their 20's). I am not putting you down believe me been there done that. Your relationship will get better in your 30's but you need to make it work.
 
Step back and ask yourself is this worth fighting over and usually it isn't. Don't sweat the small stuff. You both are still young and probably very immature (most people are in their 20's). I am not putting you down believe me been there done that. Your relationship will get better in your 30's but you need to make it work.
 
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