I'm glad you cancelled until you can arrange more of a support network. If I were you, I would schedule surgery when your fiance' can take vacation time to help you. For one, you won't feel like moving much at all, and you must not bend, lift or twist, PERIOD. Walking is mandatory and you most likely won't want to do that at all. Fiance' will have to encourage you through the pain.
I had the PLIF fusion at L5-S1 in Deceraber 06, although it was my third surgery in 12 months. My doc, opposite of yours, was VERY blunt on recovery time. He said it would likely be a month before I would stop cussing him, and he was pretty right on!
My husband was off for 2 weeks (shutdown during the holidays) and then my mother was able to come up and help as well. I have 2 teenage boys who also were very helpful. There is no way I could have done one thing for either of our dogs, one is outside 55lb, and the other is a high maintenance 18lb indoor Pekingese. lol
My sunday school class ladies took turns coming to pick me up every day after lunch to take me walking at the local mall. It was winter and bad weather, but my doc requires we walk, up to 2 miles by a month and half after surgery. The indoor mall was my only option. I wasn't allowed to drive until I was off all pain meRAB, so they had to pick me up to take me. It really helped my recovery because I was able to visit with others. (This was a brand new class for us and I literally only knew one of the women who picked me up - strangers literally helped me out, and of course they became frienRAB, but it was weird at first. .lol) They class also brought us meals for 4 weeks!!!
The pain after surgery is bad but for me, it was better than the pain I had before and also, it is pain that we know goes away, so it is easier to handle. And the thing is, if you overdo it one day, you may have to spend 2 or 3 days in bed until you recover. With only a fiance' who is gone 60 hours a week, that would be tough.
I think when it is time for you to have surgery, you will have a peace about it. Have you gotten any other opinions? I had my first 2 surgeries with orthopedic surgeons (in 2 different states) and finally went to a highly highly respected neurosurgeon for my last surgery. It finally worked, hallelujah!!
I'm having trouble now because I fainted and hit a wall on the way down. Based on the pain I am now in, I am sure it did a nuraber on my back and I am truly hoping it is something that will improve with time and not surgery!!!