...your questions!? “Sometimes I sit and wonder: how does it make me feel? I think about how maybe someday the pain of thought will go away. And if it won’t... But maybe, if you did not hurt me, if you did not lie to me, if you did not kick me when I was down, I would have learned how to see the light. The more I think about what happened, I see, that all this time you were trying to destroy me, not realizing that you were just building me up.”
We met up at the little coffee shop near our campus; it was a wonderful place to discuss anything awkward and anything serious. Until I got there, I had not thought of what I might say to him. I just walked, as I watched the cloud shapes slowly pass by. It was around 2p.m, and the spring was just unbelievable. I was glad to see the light in the world, because all this time it was just what I wanted. Everything seemed brighter, clearer, and more pure than ever.
The coffee shop we went to was simple and yet beautiful, it was one of those distinguished places lying bellow a four-floor apartment building. He got there first and landed at the two seat table near the window. I was glad, because now, we have something to stare at if he had gotten into continuous silence. We didn’t have to stare at the ceiling, or worse, each other.
I sat in front of him, as he just sat there and stirred the sugar into his coffee. By the look on his face, I knew that he was trying to choose his words carefully. Still, he stirred his coffee in wonder, and opened his mouth once in awhile only to stop himself from saying anything. You see, Alex never really had his own problems, because he never found them, and I assume it was because he chose his words so cautiously. And what was I going to say? I guess I would say whatever I was thinking, but lately I didn’t know what to even think.
I thought we would have never began to talk, until he finally chose his statement, “I’ve known you for years, you were always so outspoken, I just don’t understand how you never told me that something was so seriously wrong…after all these months. How did he get you to keep so quiet, how did could he possibly get you to not get help?” he stated. But I didn’t answer. It was not something that could be answered simply and quickly, so I began to remorsefully stir my coffee as well. It was the right thing to do. This went on for minutes, and my coffee was starting to get cold. So then, I procrastinated by stuffing my mouth with biscuits.
“Look, if you aren’t ready to talk about it, or don’t trust me with it, I guess I will understand...”
His face drooped down into this sad, heartbroken expression, but what could I say? Could I spurt out everything I have been through, into a paragraph or two? It would just leave so many holes.
Alex looked at the side walk outside of the window, I knew it would come in handy for both of us.
“You’ve been there for me, through everything. I’m surprised you didn’t know how much I trust you,” I put my hand over his, and he turned his frown. “You are one of the best people that I have ever met, I can trust you with anything. Because I know that a great friend like you, would never let me down. You built me up, I’ve grown to need you, these mistakes I’ve made, I know that you will understand me…”
My brother smiled and gained this kind of special look on his face. The kind of look in your eyes when someone trusts you with something very precious, you feel appreciated, needed, and like you are finally worth something.
“…and that’s how he did it.” Everything from that point was easy to explain. Everything from that point, was about me, the lies, and my time with Marshall.
I want to make it into a book. this might be the prologue.
We met up at the little coffee shop near our campus; it was a wonderful place to discuss anything awkward and anything serious. Until I got there, I had not thought of what I might say to him. I just walked, as I watched the cloud shapes slowly pass by. It was around 2p.m, and the spring was just unbelievable. I was glad to see the light in the world, because all this time it was just what I wanted. Everything seemed brighter, clearer, and more pure than ever.
The coffee shop we went to was simple and yet beautiful, it was one of those distinguished places lying bellow a four-floor apartment building. He got there first and landed at the two seat table near the window. I was glad, because now, we have something to stare at if he had gotten into continuous silence. We didn’t have to stare at the ceiling, or worse, each other.
I sat in front of him, as he just sat there and stirred the sugar into his coffee. By the look on his face, I knew that he was trying to choose his words carefully. Still, he stirred his coffee in wonder, and opened his mouth once in awhile only to stop himself from saying anything. You see, Alex never really had his own problems, because he never found them, and I assume it was because he chose his words so cautiously. And what was I going to say? I guess I would say whatever I was thinking, but lately I didn’t know what to even think.
I thought we would have never began to talk, until he finally chose his statement, “I’ve known you for years, you were always so outspoken, I just don’t understand how you never told me that something was so seriously wrong…after all these months. How did he get you to keep so quiet, how did could he possibly get you to not get help?” he stated. But I didn’t answer. It was not something that could be answered simply and quickly, so I began to remorsefully stir my coffee as well. It was the right thing to do. This went on for minutes, and my coffee was starting to get cold. So then, I procrastinated by stuffing my mouth with biscuits.
“Look, if you aren’t ready to talk about it, or don’t trust me with it, I guess I will understand...”
His face drooped down into this sad, heartbroken expression, but what could I say? Could I spurt out everything I have been through, into a paragraph or two? It would just leave so many holes.
Alex looked at the side walk outside of the window, I knew it would come in handy for both of us.
“You’ve been there for me, through everything. I’m surprised you didn’t know how much I trust you,” I put my hand over his, and he turned his frown. “You are one of the best people that I have ever met, I can trust you with anything. Because I know that a great friend like you, would never let me down. You built me up, I’ve grown to need you, these mistakes I’ve made, I know that you will understand me…”
My brother smiled and gained this kind of special look on his face. The kind of look in your eyes when someone trusts you with something very precious, you feel appreciated, needed, and like you are finally worth something.
“…and that’s how he did it.” Everything from that point was easy to explain. Everything from that point, was about me, the lies, and my time with Marshall.
I want to make it into a book. this might be the prologue.