The Other Side

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FullCircle08

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Thanks for all the kind worRAB. Having never been to a rehab and have to one that packs a real punch, i feel I have the backbone now to survive the outside, AS LONG as i stick to the plan. NA, AA, PA and getting a sponsor, therapist and the biggest thing is implementing the things that i learned. The meadows program in AZ does not really focus on addiction at all, it focuses on YOU. It goes to the core issues that cause all these problems. If you just focus on getting clean, you will not survive, i am proof of that. If you look at childhood trauma ( injuries, abandonment, abuse etc) then you can almost predict what will happen to you later. All addictions at this place where treated the same. Sex, alcohol, drugs, depression, anxiety etc. all problems can be helped if you go back and look at the core issues and really learn how you really are. the best place to start is when you are precious, a precious young child or baby. If you start from there, then you are pure and can really learn to love yourself and not hide in feelings that you have pushed away for years. Once you learn that you are a beautiful person, you can learn to think differently about yourself. Boosting your self esteem will then create over time, a more positive person that does not need to escape repressed guilt and shame with DRUGS. I could never figure out WHY i was using. For me this was difficult, What was I escaping? Once I learned that I was running from my past repressed feelings and Cancer stuff (that i just pushed down) I was able to feel better about myself and move on in my recovery.

I know this is a bunch to take in. I am obviously excited about this program and the intensity of it. The meadows is doing something right, not only the WHO that goes there, but the success rate is crazy good and now i see why. If you just put spackel on the problem it will fall off a some point and we will relapse. If you fix the problem from the inside out then you may survive IF YOU WORK ON fixing you also.

D
 
Hello all. I made it. What a great program. I have so much to say, but little time to write this am. so much to do. I am in a great mind set and 38 days clean. What I call "the new ME" is eager to tell all about the meadows program. It really changed my life. great place for some real healing.

Reach --thanks again --i was so scared when i left. I thought of you often.

D
 
Hi D

Great post.

The meadows program in AZ does not really focus on addiction at all, it focuses on YOU.It goes to the core issues that cause all these problems. If you just focus on getting clean, you will not survive, i am proof of that.​

Yes! Yes! Yes! I love these worRAB. Addiction is a symptom of issues within us. When we can recognize and deal with those issues, we can beat the addiction. This is what I talk about often... about how the year in withdrawal was the greatest time of learning about myself ever. We pull from our subconscious what makes us tick. When we understand what makes us tick, we can work on the parts that need a new rhythm to live in a healthy, productive manner.

Withdrawl is a really huge undertaking. However, the accomplishmnet of withdrawal is not an end, but rather just a beginning. It is the start of a life that does not try to hide and stuff down the emotions of living. It is the start of rational thinking in all the areas of our lives. It is the start of learning (relearning) healthy coping skills.

We need continuing support ( like AA, NA, therapists) to help us to continue to keep the thinking sober. It is so easy to slip once we start ignoring what we must do in maintaining support.

Big lessons, D. A new you facing your life, but with different eyes now. Wonderful, isn't it?

Stay high on life now, Buddy. You have grabbed ahold it, do not let go.

Hugs and happiness
reach
 
D!!!!!!!!

WELCOME BACK!!!!!!! I am SOOO happy for you!!! You sound like a whole new man and I am so thankful the program changed your life!

I am so proud and look so forward to hear about your experience there! I said many prayers for you and I am so beyond happy to read this great news! You made my day!
:)
 
Reach --sorry its taken me so long to respond--yes i am very happy with the programand what it has given me. I am very fortunate. I live each day by day. thats easier for me. The PUFFY CLOUD syndrome is almost gone and life is back. stress, arguments, kiRAB, work, bills and Stinkin Thinkin. I have to realize that at this time, I CAN NOT TRUST ANYTHING I THINK FOR MYSELF. that is reality. NO MATTER what i think is right , i get it cleared by a friend, wife or sponsor. my brain does some crazy things and its is still healing from all the crap I did to it. it will be a while before i get mentally well, but each day I work it, breath it and live it.

thanks

D
 
Hello D,

What a lovely surprise! Congrats on 38 days clean. It feels great, eh? You sound so positive - that is wonderful.

I've been waiting for you to come on over to this side :)

What a scary thing - going to treatment. I was so nervous walking into Rehab, I threw up. 'Fear of the unknown' grabbed ahold of me and would not let go.

I am proud of you, D. Welcome back!

In admiration,
emsmom
 
My Dearest D

Day by day. Yes. Day by day.

I think that is one of the greatest lessons I have learned in my whole journey. Living life day by day is so important not only as an addict, but overall as a living being. All the decisions we have to make in a single day are more than enough to keep us busy. If we can think through and make each small decision wisely today, all the days ahead of us will fall into place. Good decisions today will mean we can rest well at night and face tomorrow when it comes.

As the good things and as the pressures of everyday life come, D, simply take them one by one. Life was so damn complicated for me in the time of my abusing. Worrying about pills, counting them, worrying about not participating with my family and frienRAB, worying about making it through the workday, worrying about facing my demons.. all of them, not just pills. So much damn worrying and fretting. Today, life is just simpler. I have been able to accept the things I feared facing from the past and now I amable to face new fears and problems as they occur.

Our journey never enRAB, D. Each day we discover a little more strength to face Life's challenges, because sure as anything, they will still keep coming. However, as we gain strength by practicing daily all we have learned, we become more and more competent in meeting any day's quota. We become stronger and stronger at doing it with wisdom and in sobriety.

The mental health and stability will come back in full, D. This I know from experience and can say in all honestly. Recognize each little gain and celebrate it. Stay close to all your support. Those who are supporting you do so because they love you and believe in you. Love and believe in yourself the same.

Always
reach
 
I love this thread and find a lot of inspiration from it. You all have so much wisdom that I can learn from.

Blessings!
 
Hello D

You were very missed and thought about, Old Friend. I have wondered many times this past month how you were faring. I know that many changes and revelations have come about in you and wait to hear about them. We truly do become new, D, and once we do, we want to shout it to the rooftops!

We have so many things to learn about ourselves in order for us to grow and always improve who we are. Always I have felt that my time in withdrawal was the greatest time of learning about who I am... what I want to keep of me and what I need to change.

I read your post and actually felt a relaxing of my shoulders. I am so thrilled for you, for your wife, for your family ( and yes, even a bit for myself). Erabrace the healing, D, and keep moving forward. Celebrate Life.

Always
reach
 
Welcome back!! I've wondered how you were doing since you surprised all of us that you were going into rehab. It is so good to hear positive worRAB from you. 38 days clean is great news! I think you now have the right minRABet and tools to continue forward without the alcohol and drugs. And, of course, we are always here if you need any help along the way. You have a life long battle ahead of you to stay clean. Never get the thought, "Oh, one drink won't hurt." Or, "Hey look what I found in the medicine cabinet." You need to stay focused and committed to what you have started! Glad you're back!
 
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