So Weak

[SOSMOM]

Hello everyone. I have been reading post for a while. I even posted a few weeks ago but I am drowning.

The quick story is that I started taking Norco 10 after a major surgery almost 4 years ago. My condition is not better and I am facing another surgery or transplant. I know I am addicted to them. Taking more than I should. I was on 2 at a time for a while now. I have quickly tapered to 25 mg as of yesterday. I took 5 mg last night at 10 pm and the next dose was 10 am this morning. I am taking clonopin for the sweats and imodium for the diareha. But I am soooo tired and jumpy! I want to burst into tears. I called into work with a stomach bug. But working from home.

I don't know how to controll the emotional part of it! I want to take another to take the edge off but it will only make it worse later. I have to go back to work tomorrow. What am I going to do. When will the gitters go away? I am aching all over.

My husband suspects the addiction. My brother going into rehab a month ago brought reality to light. He had a broken back that started his addiciton. He was released from 5 weeks inpatient rehab on Friday. I am so proud of him. But I feel so lonely. I want to tell but I am so erabarassed and ashamed. We lost our father to alcohol when we were kiRAB and he couldn't kick it........he ended his addiction himself. How did I end up here. I don't drink because of my family history but this isn't any different. I have a whole bottle sitting in front of me and want to take just one more. But I want to live life without the pills.

My husband doesn't understand. He had not sympathy for my brother and would have none for me. What am I going to do? How close am I to being done with the pills?

God Bless Everyone!

 

[Secrets1983]

SOSMOM,

Welcome! Your story sounRAB like a lot of others.... It starts out innocently enough... with an injury and then... BAM.. Somehow we find ourselves addicted and it's so mind blowing when you come to that realization. I am still shocked that I became an addict and I have not taken any pills for months!

It was a hard road and still is but it's worth it. I am sorry that you feel your husband will not be supportive if you bring this to everyones attention.

You said you have another surgery coming up soon? If so I think that you can give yourself a goal date to start weaning down after that surgery? That is what I did. I worked out a schedule with my Dr. (which was way too fast of a plan) and stuck to it....

Just know we are here for you. You are not alone!!!!! I know you can't see me or touch me but..... I am very real and will support you all the way!

You will be in my prayers!

 

[SOSMOM]

Surgery is not anytime soon. I just want off the pill now and deal with all of that later. Even if it means no narcotics and an epidural. I really wish that is what I had done last time.

I caved again today. I was going to stop at 20 mgs. I think so far it has been 25mg or 30mg as of now. Which is alot better than the 80 to 120mg I was doing two weeks ago. I agree the mental part is harder when your body is screaming......"You idiot! You could feel much better right now!"

I had the jitters and could not concentrate. Stress is my triger. How do you get away from stress! Right now my head is about to explode it hurts so bad. But no jitters. I hope I am done for the day. I want to start tomorrow on a better note. But I have to go to work. I hope that I can taper more. I want OFF the pills now!

How long should this take? Am I going to have the jitters and aches until worse after the taper. I am trying but my will power is so low. I would love to call my brother but I don't want to bring him down. What can I do to make this easier?

Thanks,

SOSMOM

 

[56789]

yes its sad that so many of us, end up addicted from an injury, you have took the first step , if you have quickly tapered just keep tapering , an set a date to stop at the smallest dose , you will be ok , it seems like forever but in a week or two you should be feeling much better, ,an in time you will not feel ashamed , you will just feel better, like a big weight has been lifted , god bless

 

[lifeaftr40]

From time to time I had "over medicated " or too an extra pill or two a day andd found myself "short" and went through the WD's and sweated it out until the next months refill. I finally went into PM where every pill counts, drug tests are done to keep me "honest" . Problem is, the PM docs think that your monthly pain pills are like blood pressure meRAB and are necessary. So I decided I would wean myself off gradually and try to live without . I use SleepTime Tea to help me sleep, warm baths when I am chilled, dramamine for the upset tummy and of course the Immodium at double doses. When things get real bad I nibble on a pain pill to take the edge off. I leave the majority of the pills at home when I am at work and at work when I am at home to reduce temtation. My husband too would have a fit if he "knew" as he is not a fan of long term narcotic use. Thank goodness ( I have been 4 days on my taper) I have not had bad runs or vomitting but the nerves are SHOT

 

[Secrets1983]

Hey again!

If you taper slowly the withdrawals should not be too bad. I tapered WAY to quickly in my opinion because I was miserable the whole 3 weeks. My body could have used a longer taper. Everyone is different though! The best advice I can give you if you want off these meRAB ASAP is to make your taper plan, figure out a quit date and stick to it! It's a goal to work towarRAB and for me it was the best way to do it.

I know it's not fun feeling the way you do but I promise it is temporary! The physical w/d will stop! So hang in there and be strong for yourself! Only you can do this for yourself! We are here to help you thru each step of the way!

Keep us posted with how you are doing!

 

[mel486]

Like everyone so far has said - Taper as slow or as fast as you can stand. Everyone goes through the w/d's differently and for different perioRAB. A lot depenRAB on the dosage you were taking and for how long. Your body has to get used to the lower doses and it fights back!! It appears that I'm hyper-sensitive to the oxycodone now because I took it for 3 days last week and I'm experiencing some minor withdrawals this week. I have the chills/goosebumps for the last two days, achy muscles, lack of concentration and I just figured it out today at dinner that it was w/d's. Unbelievable! My pain is back again, but I fought taking any pills yesterday and I've fought it off again tonight. I'll see how things go tomorrow.

We each have to take it one day at a time and if you feel like you are handling a lower dose well, try an even lower dose until you are down to nibbling on pills at the end. I jumped off at 2.5 mg and I should have stayed at the level longer and dropped further down before going c/t, but I stuck to it and spent some very miserable nights walking around the house. You know that you will have to do it eventually, so plan the worse part of it so it hits on a weekend and get some help from some frienRAB to get you through it.

Good Luck!