My "boyfriend" and I have been together for about 8 months. We were official at one point during this past summer. At first after one month, he went back to his kid's mom. Then he decided he wanted me back and we were going to make it work.
In July, he did it again. He didn't talk/text/communicate with me for 5 days. I only reached him by calling him at work after the trip. I found out he went camping with his son and her. Again, he decided he wanted to be with me again...and I took him back.
Then, in August, he pulled the whole "I need space and time to be on my own, get my own place, etc". We were supposed to sign a lease in 5 days for our own place. He said he wasn't going to go back to her or anyone else...but he did.
The worst part about the whole thing is that he has no legal custody or visitation for his son. His son is 3 and a half. He can only see him when he calls and the mom says it's ok and it works for her schedule. She uses the child against him and leads him to believe that the only way he can see his son is if he is physically/intimately with her.
This time around, we are supposed to be moving into a different place in less than a week. The lease is not signed, but we have furniture we bought together that will be delivered the following day. I really love him and we are fantastic together. The major stressor is the kid's mom. I don't trust her and definetely don't trust them together. I am very cautious when he tells me he is going to pick up his son. I fear he is going to leave me again.
Just last night he told me he wanted to be with me for the rest of his life. Today, he said he wasn't too sure he wanted to get the place and didn't even know he still wanted to be with me. I'm so confused and hurt. Any thoughts??? Do I even bother to try and keep him around, or just let him go? It will be so hard if I have to do that. There is a lot in limbo right now.
Also, I want to be with his son. I want to have my boyfriend and his kid and make our "own family" like that. I am ready for that step, I would never have him chose me or the kid.
In July, he did it again. He didn't talk/text/communicate with me for 5 days. I only reached him by calling him at work after the trip. I found out he went camping with his son and her. Again, he decided he wanted to be with me again...and I took him back.
Then, in August, he pulled the whole "I need space and time to be on my own, get my own place, etc". We were supposed to sign a lease in 5 days for our own place. He said he wasn't going to go back to her or anyone else...but he did.
The worst part about the whole thing is that he has no legal custody or visitation for his son. His son is 3 and a half. He can only see him when he calls and the mom says it's ok and it works for her schedule. She uses the child against him and leads him to believe that the only way he can see his son is if he is physically/intimately with her.
This time around, we are supposed to be moving into a different place in less than a week. The lease is not signed, but we have furniture we bought together that will be delivered the following day. I really love him and we are fantastic together. The major stressor is the kid's mom. I don't trust her and definetely don't trust them together. I am very cautious when he tells me he is going to pick up his son. I fear he is going to leave me again.
Just last night he told me he wanted to be with me for the rest of his life. Today, he said he wasn't too sure he wanted to get the place and didn't even know he still wanted to be with me. I'm so confused and hurt. Any thoughts??? Do I even bother to try and keep him around, or just let him go? It will be so hard if I have to do that. There is a lot in limbo right now.
Also, I want to be with his son. I want to have my boyfriend and his kid and make our "own family" like that. I am ready for that step, I would never have him chose me or the kid.