Roomie Troubles

M

*Ms.Star.(=

New member
My roomate is a really nice girl. But she just doesn't understand that she's flaunting her money in front of me all the time.

Like today, she came back from the mall with 4 bags of things that she put on her mom's credit card because, "I've had a really good week and I decided to treat myself." She was showing me all her stuff and asking how I liked it. I told her it was nice. She said I should go shopping with her sometime. I then reminded her that I don't have a job and that I only have $8.60 left on my check card. I'm poor in the worst sense of the word.

I can't find a job here to save my life, and then she comes in like, "Oh, it's so wonderful to go tanning! It's just so refreshing." Or, "Do you like my nails? They cost $40." :eek:

I know she doesn't mean to flaunt it in my face, but she just doesn't get that I can't afford those things and it hurts that I feel like I'm not on the same level as her. She's always talking about her Mustang Convertable and how it's her baby. I don't even have a car. I have a bike. It's not even a new bike. I've had it for 11 years.

Now, I'm not poor. My family isn't at least. But we have 6 people and two of us are in college. That's a big drain on what money there is to go around. So I feel really bad hitting my parents up for money. I feel bad even talking to them about it because I know it hurts them that we can't always keep up with the Johnsons. I don't know. It's just so hard. And she complains that she misses her family, but she goes home every single weekend. I've been home once since school started. Talk about homesick. I just don't know what to do. :sad:

I've never not been on a level playing field money wise before. Now I just feel so out of the loop and benieth her. :thumbsdn:
 
when it gets bad enough, it gets better. just like gas prices. one of these days, you might win the lottery or something...or you can Grand Theft Auto on the mustang.
 
she's just being herself and so are you, except she believes in instant gratification at someone elses expense and will have incurred a great debt (probably for her parents) by the time she finishes school..
it's also possible that you are both actually from families with the same household income, but her's believes in throwing everything on the credit card..
let her buy all this crap.. while she's at the mall you're probably reading a book, while she runs home to mom every weekend to get her laundry done you're probably reading a book, and while she's having a nervous breakdown because she hasn't studied and her mom has cancelled the credit cards.. you're probably reading a book.
school's for learning, not being a princess.. she'll pick up on that if she's lucky.
 
I'm not in college yet but remember there are more important things out there than money,it all comes down to who is the happiest,and like void said college is for learning not partying or there to just blow it off,stick in there things get better,they always do.I'd see your family if you could afford it,that would get you out of this 'hole'.
 
just wait.. she'll be suffering in many ways.

If she seems eager to spend now.. just wait until she gets older and can't depend on her parent's income. Not only will she be uneducated, but she won't even be able to work at McDonalds. That credit card she's got in her mom's name will soon change into her name. Bad spending + no means to pay it = credit will take a plunnnge.

On top of that, she'll have skin cancer from all that tanning. She won't be educated, so she won't have a job.. therefore leaving her unable to pay for all those treatments and medications to repair her freckled, pruned skin. Besides that, her fingers will fall off from all those manicures, and she'll gain weight because she'll be depressed and shit.. none of those A&F shirts are gonna cover those rolls.. she'll have to start shopping for sweatpants to cover up her cellulite.

You, on the other hand, will be able to eat cash, burn cash, put cash in your ass, shit.. whatever the fuck you want. You will have spent enough time learning how to spend money, when to show off your shit, where to use your money, etc. because you actually gave a shit in college. Stay in school and wait for your time,

Delayed(?) gratification beats out instant. It takes longer to get, and it lasts longer to use up. Those tans are really gonna be refreshing when she's gotta see a dermatologist every 2 days.

What are you in college for?
 
She wants honesty? Give it to her. Tell her you're not really interested in talking about her purchases, and car, and bullshit, and find something better to do. Who cares if she has money, or imagines she has money? I can't believe you'd let if effect you like that! Bad magnolia, Bad!
 
Unfortunatly, she's really smart. She get's straight A's. But she won't get anything cuz she won't take on any positions in clubs or anything. If it doesn't positively affect her, like, now; she doesn't do it. She's our floor's treasurer and she said that if she had to attend the weekly meetings like me (Cuz I'm our floor's rep and I have to go to keep voting rights) that she would quit right there and then.

The skin thing is funny though. And probobly true.

Also, the debt thing will probobly be true too cuz she wants to be a High School History teacher. She's planning on taking 5 years to get her degree.

And as far as what I'm going for, it's called Communication Disorders. I want to become a speech pathologist (sp?). They help people with lisps and really heavy accents. They basically help people so that other people can understand them. The downside is I have to get my masters to practice anywhere. But there are grants I can get as a grad student. So it won't be too bad.
 
See, you're already starting to feel better.

It's ok to be poor in college. Having $8.60 on your card means you know just exactly how much things cost. It teaches you good spending habbits now which, trust me, will carry over into later life.

I wouldn't worry so much about her and what she has vs what you have. It's a futile excersize. There will ALWAYS be someone that has more than you, or has a nicer whatever than you, or has something you WISH you could have. She has money and right now you don't. She likes to flaunt it. Whatever.

Ignore it. If she wants to show you her latest purchases just tell her that you don't have time or that you have somewhere to be. Just don't give her the opportunity to flaunt it. It bothers you and somewhere inside she probably knows it. Deep down it makes her feel superior. It'll eat at her that you could not possibly be less interested in her material things. She won't get it.

When she says stuff like "Like my nails, they cost $40!" Reply with "Yeah, nice." but be bored with it. If she buys new shoes and flaunts them saying things like "It's just another pair of shoes." will really cut back on her flaunting it. She'll stop, or she'll decide you have no taste and go pester someone else.
 
Trust me, I've been trying. I've put in like 10 applications. But either they aren't hiering, or they fill the position with someone else, or whatever. I haven't even had an interview. I'm so frustrated with that whole topic.
 
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