Review a short Hetalia historical drama intro?

Yuan Yuan

New member
First attempt at it, and it hasn't been beta'd. My aim with this is to follow and recreate in my story the history between China, Taiwan, and Japan. I'm not sure if it would be characteristic for Kiku to slap Taiwan, but historically Japan has had to violently put down revolutions on its Taiwan colony so I was trying to give a sense of that.

You can go here to read it: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6297632/1/

In case you didn't want to read the whole thing, I can post most of it on here, the rest you'll have to read it on the website, sorry:

She shrugged it off without caring too much once she got word that China, that hulking, antiquated beast, had been felled by the upstart Japan. These were but hollow names to her, meaningless events that would not affect her in the slightest. She supposed China expected her to put on an elaborate display of fury, grief, and shame at being traded off to the victor as though she were a whore. Perhaps he expected the young girl to throw tantrums and demand with her tears to be returned to the older brother she never really knew, never really interacted with to care about.

In fact, even China's own clumsy conquest and declaration of guardianship over her did not result in much. He had simply come to her country one day, and violently ejected the Danish before turning around to face the little girl who did not know what was happening. China had fidgeted slightly under her clear and powerful stare, and was content to leave her alone and let her figure out her own business. And so she had grown for 200 years with little aim and direction, making things happen solely by virtue of her fiery, feisty temper.

Even as the provisions of the Treaty of Shomonoseki was read aloud to her, Taiwan said nothing. As far as she was concerned, her aloof big brother had been replaced by one that would be as equally neglectful. After all, she thought to herself, she was no Hong Kong, who was valuable enough as a port for trading to be seized by the United Kingdom. Looking down at her bare, mud-caked, and calloused feet, she laughed at the nightmare she would be to her next benefactor. That is, if he could find her amongst the rainforested mountains that seemed to overcrowd her island.

China had asked for her to wash her face and bathe, comb her hair, and for goodness sake put on some shoes for the formal exchange ceremony. Of course, not only did Taiwan fail to do any of those, she had left him standing empty handed and without face in front of Japan. As though the angry slash in his back did not pain him enough, another of his younger siblings had taken the chance to insult and humiliate him further with her disobedience. However, how did he think it would turn out? Taiwan would show up with him, quietly walk over to Japan's side and take his hand as the two left? No, he would have had to drag her kicking and screaming and had her thrown in a cage to be handed over to Japan, and he didn't have the heart to do that to a young girl. He sighed deeply and turned away, soothing his hurt ego and genuinely wounded heart by reminding himself that Taiwan the impudent was no longer his to deal with.

Taiwan had taken the chance of wording in the treaty to declare herself independent, and demanded that she be now known as the Taiwan Republic. It was with this high handed attitude that she greeted the weary Japan when he finally tracked her down through her splendid mountains and forests. The lack of roads and mountain tunnels greatly troubled him, and there was not much to be said about the public facilities. He had much to do with this new project, and yet inwardly he beamed with pride that he would have the chance to recreate his own Meiji Restoration. He smiled slightly when he saw the girl, no older than eleven or twelve standing with her feet apart, arms akimbo and wearing a fierce and proud expression on her face. What was it that Portugal had named her? 'Ilha Formosa'? Indeed he could see the untamed beauty in even her young features, unless Portugal had been referring to only her home.

He straightened out his starched white uniform; it was the cleanest clothes Taiwan had yet to see. It was a wonder that his clothes had not withered in the oppressive tropical humidity. He did not see her smirk as he gave a polite bow, and launched into his formal welcome, "I am very pleased to meet you. My name is Kiku Honda, and I am now-"
** Oops, I meant: In case you didn't want to go to the website to read it
 
Back
Top