heartsnhooves
New member
I have diagnosed depression. I know that I could find better things to do then ask this on yahoo answers. but, i used to see a therapist, the timing became difficult to keep up, i was always missing an appointment, because I forget, and frankly it got very expensive.
I have refused medication for 3 years, I have taken: zoloft, wellbutrin, and prozac. None of which helped me.
this time of year is rough for me, its the anniversary of a relatives death, whom I was very close to, nothing seems to be going right in my life, I am falling into a deep rut, and its getting very hard. Suicide is on my mind quite often, and I cut for 3 years, the main reason I stopped was because i can't deal with the scars, and the last time i cut, i had to have 12 stitches, and everyone was on my case, and I can't stand doctors trying to say, it will all be okay.
I have horrible mood swings, trust issues, and abandonment issues.
What do you think my options are? I'm not currently suicidal, it just is often on my mind. I was debating taking medicine, though it hadn't taken it for so long because 1, it didn't work for me, 2. i don't want to have to rely on some pill to be happy. I don't even take a pill for a headache.
It's getting to the point, where I want to sleep all day, I'm always tired, i don't want to talk about my problems nor my past. I just hurt, I want to cry but can't. Its like my body tries to defend itself and pushes all emotions in some deep dark place, but when they come out, I break down.
I don't know what to do. Any thoughts would be appreciated.
I have refused medication for 3 years, I have taken: zoloft, wellbutrin, and prozac. None of which helped me.
this time of year is rough for me, its the anniversary of a relatives death, whom I was very close to, nothing seems to be going right in my life, I am falling into a deep rut, and its getting very hard. Suicide is on my mind quite often, and I cut for 3 years, the main reason I stopped was because i can't deal with the scars, and the last time i cut, i had to have 12 stitches, and everyone was on my case, and I can't stand doctors trying to say, it will all be okay.
I have horrible mood swings, trust issues, and abandonment issues.
What do you think my options are? I'm not currently suicidal, it just is often on my mind. I was debating taking medicine, though it hadn't taken it for so long because 1, it didn't work for me, 2. i don't want to have to rely on some pill to be happy. I don't even take a pill for a headache.
It's getting to the point, where I want to sleep all day, I'm always tired, i don't want to talk about my problems nor my past. I just hurt, I want to cry but can't. Its like my body tries to defend itself and pushes all emotions in some deep dark place, but when they come out, I break down.
I don't know what to do. Any thoughts would be appreciated.