My bf & I r madly in love w one another have been together for 2 years now and plan to get married in the next year and a half. We have been thru alot but our relatinship has improved & blossomed so much. Including, a healthy intimate life for over a year. This is the first time we have shared such level of intimacy with one another & not in any previous relationships. To me, it has become a very important part of our relationship & has taught me to submit to my partner & allowed me to share a deeper connection that i only share during our intimate moments w him. For him, he has had some sexual trauma in his past, but has been going to a therapist to seek help. The therapies have helped alot. But, about a month & a half ago, i noticed he started to avoid intimacy. This has come up a few other times prior in our relationship, but it was during difficult situations we were goin thru or during some of his difficult therapy sessions. He told me that, at times he feels a disconnect during sex & he wanted to fix that. So i supported him as he went thru dat phase. But recently, he told me that after thinking about it for some time, he wanted us to wait till marriage. I know that he comes from a strict religious upbringing, but why is it now that he has made such a decision? What is more frustrating is that, he wants to have all the same intimate components (spending alone together, spending da night at each others place together in da same bed, takin trips together, taking showers together, etc..... need i not to go on.......), EVERYTHING ut to sex. I have supported him on this and have tried really really hard to try this because i want to be w him, but its become so frustrating. Its come to da point, where everytime we see each other, we fight because i feel frustrated & rejected. I feel i need that intimacy w him because we have had no intimate moments for almost 2 months now. And the few times we started getting into it, he gets up & leaves, as if he is a robot w no emotions or desires. It makes me feel so vulnerable
What should i do if neither is willing to change our stance on this situation? Leave him?( Pls give me ur advice....dont really kno anyone who is mature enough to talk to about dis frm my friends.
I have tried sitting down and talking to him but he continues on the same idea. He does not really care about the "orgasm factor" and he doesnt do oral. In fact, he gets anxiety when he has to finish. I believe that stems from his trauma.
What should i do if neither is willing to change our stance on this situation? Leave him?( Pls give me ur advice....dont really kno anyone who is mature enough to talk to about dis frm my friends.I have tried sitting down and talking to him but he continues on the same idea. He does not really care about the "orgasm factor" and he doesnt do oral. In fact, he gets anxiety when he has to finish. I believe that stems from his trauma.