T
The kool 1
Guest
Before you read I just want to say I wrote this just to get some thoughts out, not for any hopes of becoming a writer. I'm 20 and have not done any literary study since 15 and that was only basic so don't expect it to be all that good. I don't write often at all, mainly because I'm so busy, but I love to do it. I found this on my computer, I think I wrote it a year or so ago and noticed today a lot of people are getting their work critiqued on here, and I thought it would be cool to do the same.
The main thing I want to know is, do you guys understand where I'm coming from with what I'm writing? Can you relate to it at all, or does it just come across as poorly written and nonsensical?
Thanks:
Once, my life was so simple. Emotions were simple during childhood. I was either happy or sad. Only the happiness was real, the sadness would come or go depending on whatever each day brought. Nowadays things are different. Sadness, pain, fear and happiness all co-exist. That is life. It is a shocking reality that those you regard in such high esteem, your parents, your teachers, everyone around you, those that once seemed faultless, that they all feel scared, perhaps even depressed; they all exhibit strange social phobias, underlying issues, they’re all just human. Everybody gets lonely and as I age I see sadness rife in many around me. I see weakness in those I once thought invincible and I realise pain cannot be escaped in adulthood. The helplessness I feel when I see the lives around me deteriorate with myself unable to say or do anything about it is indescribable. The dramatised television speeches that magically repair mental wounds do very little in reality.
The main thing I want to know is, do you guys understand where I'm coming from with what I'm writing? Can you relate to it at all, or does it just come across as poorly written and nonsensical?
Thanks:
Once, my life was so simple. Emotions were simple during childhood. I was either happy or sad. Only the happiness was real, the sadness would come or go depending on whatever each day brought. Nowadays things are different. Sadness, pain, fear and happiness all co-exist. That is life. It is a shocking reality that those you regard in such high esteem, your parents, your teachers, everyone around you, those that once seemed faultless, that they all feel scared, perhaps even depressed; they all exhibit strange social phobias, underlying issues, they’re all just human. Everybody gets lonely and as I age I see sadness rife in many around me. I see weakness in those I once thought invincible and I realise pain cannot be escaped in adulthood. The helplessness I feel when I see the lives around me deteriorate with myself unable to say or do anything about it is indescribable. The dramatised television speeches that magically repair mental wounds do very little in reality.
