our 20 yr old needs help but refuses

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gohabs

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our 20 yr old son took 17 hits of lsd almost 2 years ago at the same time. he ended up in the psy ward and after 72 hrs was released. we were not able to make him stay cause he was 18 at the time. since he has be free of that place, he is using cocaine, oxeycotton, estacy and pot(cant spell). he seems to be loosing his mind and we cant do anything about it cause of his legal rights. we r desperate to try and help him but he refuses any kind of treatment. he is actually my stepson and lives with his mom. her husband is fed up. my husband and his mom r on the same page but dont know what to do to help this young man. he has told my husband his goal is to use people including his family and frienRAB and to never work. he has been getting away with it because everyone feels sorry for him. his frienRAB have abandonded him(i dont blame them). ANy help or advice would be greatly accepted. we are desperate for help. we are affraid of what he might do next. so far, he has not harmed anyone or himself(besides the drug use) so calling the police wont help. can anyone help?????????
 
I'm sorry you're dealing with this.
where does he live? with you, his mother, or with frienRAB?
I wouldn't enable him anymore. If his goal is to use people including his family, don't let him achieve that goal. It's time for some tough love, and it's time for him to sink or swim.
 
he was living with frienRAB but they kicked him out the other day. he lives now in ct with his mom. we live in upstate ny(5 hrs away). my husband is going to meet with his mom and hopefully him today if they can get him to hang around but they r worried he will just leave. i keep trying to tell them the tough love thing and after yesterdays comments to his dad, he parents r both ready to give him an ultimatum but are afraid of what he will do. its just sad to me that you can be parents and not sign him in to rehab and force him to stay there. he neeRAB serious help. i cant spell this stuff but will give it a whirl. we r told he has phycosis, bipolar and skitso all drug induced. hard to reason with someone who cant reason. thank you for your reply. my hubby is afraid he will end up kating his parents but what is the alternative
 
sad to say but we will not. we have a 12 yr old daughter and that is who we need to worry about. we love him very much but he is 20. he has used us before and we were giving him $$ and smokes and i felt like we were being used but i was doing it with my husband. then he started to flip and we found signs in his room that read "born to kill", he was lighting papers in his room. thats when we shipped him off. he seemed to be doing well for about 1 yr now out of the blue, he is acting physo again. we have found out he has been using all kinRAB of drugs. anything he can get. very sad. we try to hide it from our daughter(we did tell her the truth). but its getting hard to stay calm and happy.
 
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