Well I wouldn't be so mean, but something along those lines. I'm feeling a bit generous lately though, so let's see if I can't help the clueless.
Smart2Go is the PC application used to load maps onto your phone's memory card. You can do this through the data cable connected to the phone with the memory card inside, or you can plug the card itself into a card reader. You shouldn't have to update anything on the phone itself since you already have Maps built into the N95.
WLAN is wifi, just like on a laptop. You can connect to wireless access points, like a router or a hotspot at Starbucks or something for a fast data connection. If you're unfamiliar with this technology, I have no sympathy and I am not going to explain it. I sincerely hope I don't have to explain something like that to you AFTER you've already purchased an $800 phone.
The N95 like the rest of the N series has speaker independent voice dialing, This means that you do not need to train or record your voice to use voice commands, as a computer generated algorithm has already done so. Just hold the right soft key, you'll hear the voice tone, and speak a command when the prompt comes on the screen. The application itself allows you to organize any voice commands you'd like for applications in addition to the voice commands for your contacts.
Anything else, while I'm on a roll?