No desire to have sex/intimacy with husband?

M

Mary

New member
We had our precious little girl 6 months ago. Since then, my husband and I have not had much sex or intimacy. Because of this he is now calling me his roommate to his friends. Which is very hurtful and I have expressed this towards him but he keeps on saying it. No matter how much I explain to him how I'm exhausted after the day ends he still doesn't get it. I don't know what to do. I'm the one who cleans and cooks and I stay at home with our baby girl. I'm the one who gets up with her at least once a night and I'm the one who gets up with her in the morning which is around 6:30am. He doesn't contribute to anything besides go to work. He works a mid shift so he sleeps in until 9 and then goes to the gym and doesn't help me out and isn't home till midnight. I don't want to "do it" just to get him to shut up. I don't know what to do. I'm emotionally and physically exhausted. Please help. Is there something wrong with me?
It doesn't get through to him. It makes me not even want to be around him anymore. He just annoys me now. Half the time my daughter cries when she's with him until I come into the room and then wants me to hold her. So there isn't any chance for me to get a few min. to myself unless she's napping. I honestly don't know what to do anymore. It just doesn't get through.. and he says I'm wrapped up in myself and everything he does is for me.. last time I had to myself??? End of March!!! That was to go get a pedi and he complained about that because he didn't get to go fishing!!!!! UGGGGGGGGH MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STUBBORN ASS MEN!!!!!!!!!!
 
Im sorry that you have to go through this! and not all men are like this... my daughter is 8 months old and her daddy works and I stay home but when he gets home he takes over watching her while I cook shower relax on the computer read or do whatever I want to do. On his days off he watches her so I can go tan and shop and also on his days off he gets up with her in the morning to change and feed her! If he isnt listening to you then maybe you could try counseling. It seems like he is being a d*ck to me by calling you a room mate to his friends . As much as I hate to say this you may need to give him an ultimatum if he is not willing to take a few extra steps in the relationship! You deserve someone to help you and enjoy doing so! I wish you the best!
 
I think your feelings are perfectly normal. My daughter is 8 months and I still feel the same way as you. I know it is hard for husbands to understand, but you are just going to have to keep trying to explain, or maybe it some things for him to read about it (baby books or magazines sometimes have articles explaining how a woman feels after having a baby). Maybe reading that would help your husband be more sympathetic. He sounds like he needs to take a little more responsibility for the baby. I hope that he will step up to be a good dad and husband. There is nothing wrong with you!
 
Tell him it makes you sooo horny when he helps or cooks dinner, then when he does, screw his brains out...lol j/k (not really, it might work!)

I dont think there is anything wrong with you, as I went through the same thing. After my second baby my sex drive was gone...I didnt have any drive at all...I stayed like this for 2.5 years! All the way until I got pregnant again, fo rsome reason now that I am prego, I am back to normal now...I sure hope it stays this way.
I really think it is a lot to do with hormones, and secondly exhaustion.
Are you on birth control? That could be screwing with your hormones, or it could just be having a baby threw the balance off. I honestly think this is what happened to me, why else would pregnancy correct the problem?

Talk to your ob gyn about it. Ask if there is some hormone therapy oyu can try.
 
Tell him it makes you sooo horny when he helps or cooks dinner, then when he does, screw his brains out...lol j/k (not really, it might work!)

I dont think there is anything wrong with you, as I went through the same thing. After my second baby my sex drive was gone...I didnt have any drive at all...I stayed like this for 2.5 years! All the way until I got pregnant again, fo rsome reason now that I am prego, I am back to normal now...I sure hope it stays this way.
I really think it is a lot to do with hormones, and secondly exhaustion.
Are you on birth control? That could be screwing with your hormones, or it could just be having a baby threw the balance off. I honestly think this is what happened to me, why else would pregnancy correct the problem?

Talk to your ob gyn about it. Ask if there is some hormone therapy oyu can try.
 
Im sorry that you have to go through this! and not all men are like this... my daughter is 8 months old and her daddy works and I stay home but when he gets home he takes over watching her while I cook shower relax on the computer read or do whatever I want to do. On his days off he watches her so I can go tan and shop and also on his days off he gets up with her in the morning to change and feed her! If he isnt listening to you then maybe you could try counseling. It seems like he is being a d*ck to me by calling you a room mate to his friends . As much as I hate to say this you may need to give him an ultimatum if he is not willing to take a few extra steps in the relationship! You deserve someone to help you and enjoy doing so! I wish you the best!
 
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