Newcomer, I can't do it alone anymore!

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tblessedwith2

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I am 5 days in recovery I guess? I am still having symtoms of withdrawl from opiates, and I want to use sooooo bad! I am confused, and I am scared because each time I relapse it gets harder to find my way back. I have been an addict since I was 12, and I hate myself even more each time I relapse! I go to my therapist on Tuesdays, Wednesdays I go to my drug counselor, Thursdays i go to addiction group, and once a month I go to my pychatrist. I honestly wonder why I do all this? I leave any one of them places, and I am usually popping a pill into me before I leave the parking lot! I don't want it anymore. I need help. I thank you for any advice you may have:confused:
 
whats up tblesswith2..? 'Secondo Go' here. Im relatively new to the board as well, maybe bout 2 weeks. I would sugguest talking alot on here. Itll get your thoughts out (i see your in therapy, counselling, and a group) but maybe this is the 4th outlet you can reachout to to help you get clean, if thats what you want.

Me i was on oxys for 2 years everyday....kicked it cold turkey...then relapsed with morphine. I am now bout to detox, So your about 5 or 6 days ahead of me.

Welcome and Like I said talk talk talk...people here know I like to, and they dont ever tell me to shut up sooooo hahahaha j/k.

Its tough hey? These little miniature pills have a hold on us, when if you think of it, we tower over them in size. Its as if a rock from the beach was able to control a buliding! lol good luck, and yo! stay on your path...your 5 days in????!!!!! thats more than a lot of us can say for ourselves .... Im on day, well... zero...gonna take my last codeines (3) today.
 
Well, I posted that and this is the first chance i've had to come back on here. Thank you for your support. It is a hard road, i've done it alot. Detoxing sucks! I am still feeling pretty lousy, and I am trying to use all my resources available to me. I wish first off it would stop freakin snowing! I am going nuts with anxiety from withdrawl, and cravings. Every time I have to go to an appointment in this snow, it just makes my anxiety all that much worse! XANAX Trigger big time! I am resisting though.:angel:
 
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