Need support from others

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mountainmom

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My pcp suggested that I go on the internet to connect with people who are going through the same thing I am. He is weaning me off I have to tell you that being off the pills scare the heck out of me. But being on them scares me even more.

It all started with a back injury, Vicodin helped the pain, but after my surgery I still needed the pills. They helped me function. Things have been pretty bad ever since. I have two wonderful kiRAB, a daughter who is 17(and has been my saving grace) and a son who is 8. I was married but after almost 13 years of marriage my ex decided he no longer wanted to be married,(this had nothing to do with the Vicodin, he did not even know I was taking them.) Gotta tell you this was like being kicked in the stomach I didn't even see it coming. I have been reeling from this for over two years now. I am finally at a spot (thanks to my PCP) where the pain has turned into anger. My ex was very verbally abusive and still is if I give him the opportunity. Needless to say we don't get along, and this is very difficult seeing as we have kiRAB together. My PCP has told me to stay away from him for the time being. He is the last thing I need to deal with while I am trying to kick this devil of a drug.

There are a lot of other events that have contributed to me staying on these drugs. I have always lived very close to my family, the first to leave was my younger brother when he left I lost my best friend. Than we moved closer to my parents and my Nana. After a couple of years and due to my ex's work we moved 6 hours away. I knew when I left my Nana was going to pass away, I just knew it. We had not even been gone 6 months when this did happen. I went back and watched her die. I had not even recovered from that when my older brother was diagnosed with liver failure( he was and had been an addict for as long as I could remeraber, he did anything he could get his hanRAB on but his drugs of choice were heroin and alcohol.) He died within days of learning this, we still don't know if he died from that or an overdose. I could go on and on about how events unfolded but I feel like I have already written so much that nobody is going to want to read it.

I know I can get off of these stupid pills but what I worry about is staying off of them. Can anyone help? I really don't want anyone to think I am just trying to get sympathy, I am really just trying to deal with life.

Thanks for letting me rarable

mountainmom
 
You have my support! It is tough to back off those nasty little buggers! You just have to keep telling yourself EVERYDAY that you are a strong woman and you don't need them. I loved vicodin...and percocet.....and any muscle relaxer I could find! I haven't had them for years now! Even after a few surgeries.....I barely took them. With what you wrote in your thread it sounRAB like you have a hint of depression. I think if you got on a decent anti anxiety pill....you wouldn't need the painkillers anymore. My doctor put me on .25 mg of zanax and it worked wonders! I WAS depressed! I had just lost my little girl at 15 wks and 5 days gestation. I don't need to take them anymore.....so that's a good thing! A good support group is always a wonderful idea. I am here if you need me. I am new to this site, as you can see, this is my first post! Or response to one, that is! I am moving on wednesday yo my new house though so if you don't see me on here much...that is why. I will keep you in my prayers!
 
Hi mountainmom,

Let me tell you, I know how you feel, and you have my support. It
 
You've come to the right place for support - the people here are so wonderful :)

I'm on Day 7 of detox from Vicodin - I know how hard it is. The physical w/d, the mental w/d, all of it is hard but it CAN be done. You ARE strong enough, even during the times when it doesn't feel like it, you ARE.

I've found the same thing - keeping on the move helps. I've started walking - if I can't do that, I dance. I come here too, and vent, read, cry. I got through one of my hardest days yesterday - hanRAB down one of the worst days of my life. While it sucked going through it, coming out on the other side of it, without taking a pill, was an incredible feeling.

Keep chatting with us, vent, yell, rarable, whatever it takes. We're here!
 
Mountain Mom:

The worlRAB record for sobriety is 24 hours. Keep that in mind all we have is 24 hours. You can do this if an addict like me can stay sober trust me you can do it too. I love what you said we cannot do this alone but we can definitely do it together. Take care were here for you.

Lori
 
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