"Wow, those interior designers were good,” said Jean.
"I know, isn't it great? I'm so glad it's done so we can live in it now," Catherine whispered.
"I know it’s been like two a few years now, last time I saw this place there was nothing here."
Jean agreed, "yeah but it was worth the wait."
"Jean!" a high pitch voice called.
It was Victoria, Catherine’s mother she appeared from behind a large door smiling beautifully as usual. She had on a bright yellow dress, no makeup and her hair in a sleek bun.
"You’re here!" Said Victoria .
Jean ran to Victoria and hugged her tight, “It’s so great to see you, Auntie,” said Jean following Filipino tradition of calling an elder aunt or uncle especially when it’s a friend’s parent.
"Can I get you anything, tea, water, food?"
"Um, actually I’m a little tired," said Jean.
Without looking at Catherine Victoria barked an order, "Catherine take her to your room.”
“Alright, come on Jean.”
(rewrite this for the better and win)
"I know, isn't it great? I'm so glad it's done so we can live in it now," Catherine whispered.
"I know it’s been like two a few years now, last time I saw this place there was nothing here."
Jean agreed, "yeah but it was worth the wait."
"Jean!" a high pitch voice called.
It was Victoria, Catherine’s mother she appeared from behind a large door smiling beautifully as usual. She had on a bright yellow dress, no makeup and her hair in a sleek bun.
"You’re here!" Said Victoria .
Jean ran to Victoria and hugged her tight, “It’s so great to see you, Auntie,” said Jean following Filipino tradition of calling an elder aunt or uncle especially when it’s a friend’s parent.
"Can I get you anything, tea, water, food?"
"Um, actually I’m a little tired," said Jean.
Without looking at Catherine Victoria barked an order, "Catherine take her to your room.”
“Alright, come on Jean.”
(rewrite this for the better and win)