My rant

J

JeeVee

New member
Ahh, time to get some shit off my chest. Most of the time I fucking hate life. Now none of you really know me so this probably won't mean shit for you, but this is for me since I never talk to anyone, I keep everything bottled up, yes unhealthy I know, trust me on that one.

Yeah so for the past eight years I get bronchitis or pneumonia at least 3 times a year minimum which always leads to the lovely coughing up of blood and having people look at me like I am a rotting corpse which is kinda funny to me, but still. Mix that with the asthma and the fact that I am a fucking moron and smoke, it makes any vigorous activity a pain in the ass. Thankfully menthol smokes have made it so I never really need an inhaler anymore. They actually work better for my messed up body.

Then thanks to me keeping crap inside all the time I developed a bleeding ulcer. On good days I am fine, on bad days it feels like someone is stabbing me repeatedly in the stomach and giving me a barbed wire enema. Now when you feel like that staying at work is quite a task, and when I go home my sup decides that it wasn't a good enough reason. She has since changed her mind after I was in her office taking to her and my stomach started hurting really bad and I "accidentally" spit blood on her desk.

The worst thing though, is that my girlfriend thought she was pregnant and she went to the Dr. he said she wasn't pregnant, which was fine, but then her stomach started to hurt. She went to a different dr and that one told he she wasn't pregnant because she had a miscarriage. Now that is just not cool in my book. So she has beeen in pain for a few days and yesterday went in and got her body "purged" so to say to get rid of the fetus and everything because her body wasn't dealing with it herself. Man, if you only knew how much I wanted to go to that first dr and take a scapel and start to skin him alive, then I could refresh his memory of the human body without the skin in the way, starting by pointing out all the muscles and then ripping out his organs and showing them to him.:sword:
 
Maybe you should take care of yourself instead of "just" ranting. That would make more sense and give you more justification in your rant ya know. Because then you could at least say that you "really" actually tried and that shit still didn't work out and you still have bad health or something.
 
Some of us know how you feel, though many will pretend to empathize. I hope you find a way to cut through the shit and find some happiness, because it's all that gets me through.
 
It's wonderful how the mind takes all of that unexpressed emotion and directs it to ravaging our body. Kind of self-defeating, but definitely a sign.

I could go on for hours describing various ways to deal with asthma, chronic bronchitis, and ulcers, but you've probably got the medical angles sorted out.

So if it helps, feel free to rant, rave, scream like a banshee, cheer or cry. We probably won't be able to help much, but it's better than bottling it up.

Hugs to your and your lady.
 
Don't smoke.

Thats what my doctor keeps telling me.

And that I have the lungs of a 90 yr old.

Which probably isn't very good.

At least, quit smoking before you are 30.

And you can let it all out here, but you won't always get the response you'd expect.
 
The best part about the smoking, since I haven't used my inhaler since I started smoking and it have been about 2 years now since I started smoking again. My dr started to give me shit about smoking and I told him that I hadn't needed the inhaler since I started again and he told me to just keep smoking then.
 
I really hope you get it all out. I'm doing the same often but get it out of me by drinking. Don't start with that healing because it wont do you any god. Find an other way.

And for that doctor I would have feel the same, hate doctors that can't make their job. But have in mind that even doctors are human and can make misstakes.
 
Smoking helps with asthma for only one reason. The smoke opens up the esophagus so that it doesn't tighten up. However, it still is dangerous for your lungs. And I would rather suck on an inhaler than have lung cancer. But guess what? Life isn't fair, so you might never get lung cancer. My Aunt never smoked in her life and still got lung cancer. So, do whatever you want. If you quit you still have a chance of dying. And about the miscarriage, that fucking sucks. I don't know how that would feel as I never had that happen to me. So I can't sympathize with you, but I can agree with you...
 
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