So I started to accept myself as a lesbian over the summer. I didn't think I'd tell my mom, but a couple of weeks ago, she just bluntly asked me if I was confused about my sexuality. I told her yes, I'm gay. Yesterday, she asked me if I was sure. I truthfully told her no, and then she asked if I would consider dating boys, just to see if I even like it (I've never had a boyfriend, I've never been kissed - by a guy or girl).
Before I came out to myself, I thought I liked guys. I liked the way they look, and for some reason I especially liked guys' hair. I always just had petty crushes, though. I was kind of boy crazy; my friends knew me as the one to point out a hot guy or look through magazines for actors I liked.
But in the back of my head, I always knew that I liked girls. Looking back, I was extremely awkward around girls I thought were pretty, and I had several crushes on my female teachers in middle school. I never really admitted this to myself, though.
In ninth grade, I became friends with a bisexual girl in the grade above mine. She was always saying how she "doubted" my sexuality, and I think she may have liked me. I became very self conscious about whether people judged me and assumed me as a lesbian, and I kind of became obsessed with disproving that I was gay. I really wasn't accepting my deep feelings. I told my friend that I wasn't gay, and she asked me if I were sure, and I said yes. She sounded disappointed.
Last year, in tenth grade, I became good friends with a girl I found extremely pretty, and she grew to become my best friend. I knew that I liked her, and so in May, I contemplated my thoughts and took the first step in accepting myself. Since then, I've been very open with myself and I am much happier.
I do still like male appearance, though. I am not at all attracted to guys sexually or emotionally, though, not that I know of. I like the way guys dress, I like male faces, and sometimes I still think to myself, "he's hot."
I've had several crushes on guys. The last crush was I had was in February on a friend of mine, but he turned out to be a jerk.
So, what I'm trying to ask is whether my mother could be right; should I really not rule guys out completely, considering I've never had any experience in that? Even though I am not attracted to guys, that I know of, anymore? Am I bisexual?
My mom told me that she's totally accepting of my sexuality either way, and that she and my dad will support me 100%.
As of right now, I can't really imagine myself with a guy. I can't see myself getting married or even having a boyfriend.
Before I came out to myself, I thought I liked guys. I liked the way they look, and for some reason I especially liked guys' hair. I always just had petty crushes, though. I was kind of boy crazy; my friends knew me as the one to point out a hot guy or look through magazines for actors I liked.
But in the back of my head, I always knew that I liked girls. Looking back, I was extremely awkward around girls I thought were pretty, and I had several crushes on my female teachers in middle school. I never really admitted this to myself, though.
In ninth grade, I became friends with a bisexual girl in the grade above mine. She was always saying how she "doubted" my sexuality, and I think she may have liked me. I became very self conscious about whether people judged me and assumed me as a lesbian, and I kind of became obsessed with disproving that I was gay. I really wasn't accepting my deep feelings. I told my friend that I wasn't gay, and she asked me if I were sure, and I said yes. She sounded disappointed.
Last year, in tenth grade, I became good friends with a girl I found extremely pretty, and she grew to become my best friend. I knew that I liked her, and so in May, I contemplated my thoughts and took the first step in accepting myself. Since then, I've been very open with myself and I am much happier.
I do still like male appearance, though. I am not at all attracted to guys sexually or emotionally, though, not that I know of. I like the way guys dress, I like male faces, and sometimes I still think to myself, "he's hot."
I've had several crushes on guys. The last crush was I had was in February on a friend of mine, but he turned out to be a jerk.
So, what I'm trying to ask is whether my mother could be right; should I really not rule guys out completely, considering I've never had any experience in that? Even though I am not attracted to guys, that I know of, anymore? Am I bisexual?
My mom told me that she's totally accepting of my sexuality either way, and that she and my dad will support me 100%.
As of right now, I can't really imagine myself with a guy. I can't see myself getting married or even having a boyfriend.