my latest poem please comment!?

S

Summer

New member
Beautiful. Very creative. You can almost picture yourself as if you were the one saying the poem outloud especially when you use the descriptions in this passage, "And I am sitting in a chair without legs
Beginning to dance with the thoughts that take my hands and stand me up

Beside the idea of my being in space surrrounded by a space
Where all I am and ever was
has been given it's own room to decorate
as the dust swirls around and the shelves begin to collect it.

It's an exercise of the mind to keep all these ideas moving
At a steady speed through the brain waves
On the longwinding trails of the head
Within the comprehensible space of it's four corners and walls."
 
Thought process

God is always in all rooms of the house.

But i still feel His homelike presence
In the small space of here that I am in.

And wherever here really is
Its door is wide open
And I am near the corner of it.

And I am sitting in a chair without legs
Beginning to dance with the thoughts that take my hands and stand me up

Beside the idea of my being in space surrrounded by a space
Where all I am and ever was
has been given it's own room to decorate
as the dust swirls around and the shelves begin to collect it.

It's an exercise of the mind to keep all these ideas moving
At a steady speed through the brain waves
On the longwinding trails of the head
Within the comprehensible space of it's four corners and walls.

They are now slowing their pace the way my body does
when it forgets to discuss with the mind what a noun is
To refresh its memory of something being a person, place, or thing
in the distance

The proper noun to run toward
While first involving some form of action to get there.

My thought processes are sometimes
Long trecherous hikes
Other times short scenic strolls.
 
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