My husband wont have sex with me or any kind of intimacy.?

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Ana L

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My husband will not have sex with me. When I was pregnant we found out that the baby had a birth defect we were both very sad and worried so my husband told me that we would not have sex for the rest of the pregnancy so that we would not hurt the baby, I agreed. When the baby was born she had heart surgery and was in the NICU for over a month. We we very sad, depressed, scared for our baby. Well the baby is now 9 months old and my husband still does not want to have sex with me. I have asked him to be intimate but he always has an excuse. First he would tell me no because you are breast feeding and I feel that I am invading the babys space. other "excuses" are that he is tired, busy, or he will just ignore me. I am tired of asking him because he always rejects me and I dont want to seem like thats all I think about. Life has been difficult since our baby was born we have been very stressed and are always taking the baby to doctor appointments and are confronted with a second surgery. I spend my days and night taking care of the baby and attending to her needs, but I do have a desire to have a loving intimate relationship with my husband. Somethimes I wonder if there is a reason other than our babys healt. I dont know what to do I am 28 years old and I have the need to be intimate. I did not gain too much weight during my pregnancy because I was very depressed about the baby's health, so I don't think I look undesirable. Any suggestions will help.
 
Have you flat out told him this? You need to. It's hard to know how to answer this kind of question when we don't know what he has said about this.

I'd be jumping up and down throwing a temper tantrum at this point. lol One way or another, I'd get sex or he'd get out.
 
First of all I hope everything goes well with your baby. You sound like a wonderful mother and I'm sure your precious child will be fine. I can only assume this but I think your husband may be depressed. He was very fearful for the baby's health and probably still is. Men aren't good at showing sadness as much as women or talking about their feelings. This is probably why he is having difficulty being intimate with you. He may fear for another pregnancy and the stress of that is too much for him. If he is otherwise a good husband and father, give him a little more time and if things don't improve in that area, seek counseling.
 
hmm... well are there things that you remember from when you were intimate before that he really liked? like certain outfits, or ways you kissed him or something? could he possibly suffering from some depression that might make him feel like he can't uh, get it up? maybe you should seriously talk to him and find out if he's having a problem first.
 
lol...sorry you should change your name..i just clocked on to what the person stated above.

Okay real talk...do you think your husband feels to blame about your baby together having a birth detect. Maybe you should try talking to him as i do not know if this has scared him and he is blaming himself. Could be a possibility.
 
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