My girlfriend is against premarital sex, should I jump ship now? Pros and cons of...

  • Thread starter Thread starter Nick D
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Nick D

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...no sex until marriage.? Hi there. My girlfriend and I have been dating steadily for 3 months now. I love her a great deal. We always talk about the future, and about how we want to have children together. She's really special and I could foresee proposing to her in the future. She is definitely someone special. But the other day she hit me with a comment that left me speechless. "I don't want to have sex until we're married. I know too many people who have been hurt by it before being married. This is my promise." Now I know it may seem immature or play into stereotypes, but my heart nearly fell out of my chest when she said this. I totally do not agree. I contemplated leaving her. I love her to death and have plans for the future, but I don't feel that a relationship can continue through such a disagreement. I tell her all the time how I disagree with "her promise." I feel that we disagree on where sex comes in relationship to marriage in terms of love. I feel she is denying herself a human condition; love. We should make love while we're youthful. I don't plan on marrying until I'm finished with college, and have a secure job so that I can provide for a family. I told her I don't mind waiting 6 months until she turns 18, but everyday I think of her promise, and everyday it bugs me. I dont want to set ourselves up for a great cataclysm, but at the same time I feel that it's better to love and lost than never loved at all. I feel that it's unrealistic to wait until marriage, that the only way to do so is to not have a boyfriend/girlfriend.
My current plan is to wait until she is of age, and if she still doesn't love me enough to notice that it upsets me and change, then I will help her meet her unrealistic promise by leaving her. I really hope it never comes to that. Please help. Thanks in advance for any wizened insight.
 
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