My eating disorder & What to do about it?

[Chris]

I am a 21 year old guy and I have an eating disorder. I have had anoxeria at first but then I now have Bulima. I just hate myself so much! I am almost 6 ft tall & I have a light tan skin color, I have straight jet black hair styled liked Jim Carrey in the mask. I have brown eyes, and I'm very very skinny. My eating disorders are because of my miserable repeated failures with girls & getting a girlfriend. It all started on prom night when the girl of my dreams who I dated for a while left me for my best friend. That same night when I saw her dancing with him & I saw the two of them kiss, I went into the boys bathroom & forced myself to throw up. I looked in the mirror afterwards & I was dressed in a nice suit and I started crying because I loved this girl so much & it killed me to see her with my best friend. She was so beautiful, & I did everything for her & I was so nice to her, anything she wanted I got for her & I sent her flowers & candy all the time to make her feel special & to let her know I much I loved & appreciated her. She always said she loved me too! But now that she has left me for my best friend, I realized I had lost her & that I had failed. To this day I still throw up after I eat most of the time not only because of that but because I have failed so many other times too & girls just don't like me! I am confident when I am with a girl, I smile all the time, I laugh & make jokes, I always try to have a good sense of humor & I'm such a nice guy. Now I work all the time & I make good money but I'm not happy because I'm so lonely. It hurts so much when you work with a group of 7 or 8 guys every night & everyone has a wife or a girlfriend & I don't. I am the only single guy amoung my friends & co-workers, & family & it kills me everytime I think about it. Everyone at work has a loved one to go home to every night after a hard night of work except me. I am so lonely. I am getting thinner every week & I am still not getting any attention by any girls. I am starting to feel sick & I know I'm underweight but I don't care because if I die I won't be missed anyways! Should I keep throwing up & losing more weight or should I stop? What will help me get a girlfriend so I don't have to feel so miserable & lonely anymore? Please give me some advice! Thanks!