I got out of the army. I don't mean to be rude or "judgemental" towards you. Children NEED their mothers. and they NEED their parents. When I found out I was pregnant I got out of the army. My husband is in Iraq right now,and if I would have stayed in, I would just be getting back from afghanistan. I think it is selfish, and I think it is bad for the children, I could not imagine being away from my son like that. It's not just that I would miss him, but he trusts me, and he knows I will always be there for him and protect them. By leaving him for a year, I am breaking his trust that is so crucial to his young development.
If I were you I would disband my family care plan, they will either keep you on rear D until you ETS, or chapter you. My sergeant and her husband were both deploying, his mother was their family care plan. They told the commander that she was too sick to take care of their son, they just put her on rear D. And if you're dual military you should know that just because your husband is back ,because he is active duty he doesn't count as family care plan.