abuse? And how to tell a guy? I haven't had any contact with my family for 15 years due to family strife. When I was 12 years old, my older brother molested me over the course of about a year. I told my parents and they did nothing to stop it, and in fact my mother told me that I needed to cover up with a robe and not walk around the house in my nightgown, and I needed to read the Bible more. It was very messed up, and I eventually cut off all contact with them because it was too hard on me to have them in my life.
I'm now going through a divorce and feel like I'll have a hard time meeting a man who will accept this...I would like to not even tell them about it, but they will want to know why I don't have contact with my family, and you sort of need a very good reason for that. I feel some guys might be weirded out by it or see me as damaged goods. I'm completely normal though. I like to joke around, have fun, I'm well-educated and I have a great career I'm successful in, and I doesn't have sex issues. I love sex (just not with my ex
). I just worry about about how to tell a man about this and that he'll be scared off. So honestly, men, what would you think of someone like me? I just want to know how much of a handicap this is for me -- and how to bring it up. If the topic of family comes up, usually I just tell people at first that I don't have family to speak of. Then, IF they ask, I say that I grew up in an abusive situation and don't have contact with family due to that. I don't tell anyone about the sexual aspect - the only person who knows that is my soon-to-be ex husband and a very few close friends...but I'm sure that the next man I'm in a serious relationship with will want to know the situation...and maybe he has a right to know too, even though I don't think it affects me.
@Ryde On... It does feel like it would kill the mood just a tad. Probably best to tell him, if at all, after having sex a few times so he knows it's not going to be lousy. I guess it's probably not something that he needs to know. I don't want to have to make that part of every relationship I have, needlessly.
I'm now going through a divorce and feel like I'll have a hard time meeting a man who will accept this...I would like to not even tell them about it, but they will want to know why I don't have contact with my family, and you sort of need a very good reason for that. I feel some guys might be weirded out by it or see me as damaged goods. I'm completely normal though. I like to joke around, have fun, I'm well-educated and I have a great career I'm successful in, and I doesn't have sex issues. I love sex (just not with my ex
). I just worry about about how to tell a man about this and that he'll be scared off. So honestly, men, what would you think of someone like me? I just want to know how much of a handicap this is for me -- and how to bring it up. If the topic of family comes up, usually I just tell people at first that I don't have family to speak of. Then, IF they ask, I say that I grew up in an abusive situation and don't have contact with family due to that. I don't tell anyone about the sexual aspect - the only person who knows that is my soon-to-be ex husband and a very few close friends...but I'm sure that the next man I'm in a serious relationship with will want to know the situation...and maybe he has a right to know too, even though I don't think it affects me.@Ryde On... It does feel like it would kill the mood just a tad. Probably best to tell him, if at all, after having sex a few times so he knows it's not going to be lousy. I guess it's probably not something that he needs to know. I don't want to have to make that part of every relationship I have, needlessly.