Losing friends cause of this.

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Em55

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so i am really having another down night. Since i have gotten really sick this summer my frienRAB are getting slimmer and slimmer. People ask me how im doing. I wish i could honestly tell them im happy and doing fine. But in reality im terrified of everything happening. I only have one friend who understanRAB that i really am sick and that if im complaining, i just need someone to give me a hug and just listen. How do you guys stay so strong? I try. i have tried to stop complaining and try to just be chippy all the time but thats not me and im tierd of lieing. I am in high school and i know most of them just want to party but i dont understand why known of them can even show true emotion for me.

Just need to get this off my chest and i know on here i wont be "the complainer" when im just saying how i feel. I have lost most of my hope. I want it back.
 
Hi char, thanks. I do realize that this is just the beginning of probably a really long stuggle to get this under complete control. The doctor told me that because there is so much going on that we are going to take it one step at a time. The first step was that she just wants to see what medicine/corabo will get my reflex under control. I think the next step is going to be to figure out what is going on inside.She mentioned that if i am still in this much pain, due to the suspected hiatal hernia, that she is going to send me to an upper gi to figure out if thats whats really going on.

Thanks MR for explaining all these possible tests that we all will at some point have to do.
 
Yea i think you should try the Zantac. I took this before i even knew anything about acid reflex. I would take it every once in a while usually at night when my stomach would be uncomfortable and it has always worked with no side effects that i notice. It may be a little different for each person but i am also allergic and non responding to alot of medicine and this has been my only relief in the last year.

Charberry,, yea it sucks to have people around you that just dont understand. I think some people think that it is in our heaRAB, and that we really just complain a lot about nothing. A lot of people didnt believe me at first that i was having trouble breathing, but i had my coaches stand up for me when my face was turning like blueish from not getting enough air and they would be mad at me for over doing it. Now im at the point when i dont get asthma attacks at all, and im hoping to be back to basketball next year after i get this under control!If i end up having the surgery i think i will be out for a while.

Im feeling better now that i have taken the zantac and sudefed 12 hour.
Once that settles in im able to eat and actually digest some of it.
Good luck guys!
just remeraber that other people dont understand unless they have dealt with something like this.
 
Hi Em55! First of all Big Hugs from me!! You aren't alone. Do you have acid reflux trouble too? I feel like you do to. This is the only place I can come to and vent. People understand me here. You can talk to us here anytime.

I feel like I am pushing people away from me who don't understand acid reflux or anxiety disorder. It's all very real. You can share your heart here in trust us. :angel:
 
HI Em! Is it bright red on the tissue? If so it could be right at the opening. I get little tears there for constipation and diahrea. That is nothing to worry about. But if it is coming from way up in there you may want to get it checked out. Sometime if you have a firm bm it can be streaked with red coming out as it goes by the tear. Try not to worry. It heals up. Sorry to be graphic.
 
Hi,

I just wanted to calm your fears about the sedation. It's not bad at all. I've had four surgeries under general anesthesia, which is much, much deeper than the sedation they give for endoscopies. I've also had three other surgeries and two procedures, including an endoscopy, under sedation and had no problem whatsoever. Really, anesthesia and sedation are very, very safe. It's extremely rare for anyone to ever die from it.

Good luck with the procedure. I hope everything goes well for you.
 
Thanks ladies!! I agree it has probably nothing with eating. The blood is red but not super red. I am not getting very much so when i went to the bathroom i think it might not have came out as easy as it should have. Sorry thats pretty graphic. I have had it when i was really constipated. This one just had a little more than usual and every time i wipe back there, i get a little bit which isnt usual.Me and my mom talked about it and we decided we would wait it out and see if it gets worse or better and next time i see my doctor i will let her know, maybe they can get my endoscopy done and just do a colonscopy thing at the same time while im asleep :)
 
YEa i am happy 2008 is over with and new years eve will give me a little insight to how my 2009 is going to be. I think i might have anxiety issues also. I have put that on the back burner for now. I have other things to worry about lol.
Dont worry about me. I deal with it and just need at least a few of my frienRAB to help out and stick with me. I am kinda glad i am going through this though because it is further giving me an idea of who are my true frienRAB. Im so sorry about the ibs. I usually never have diarea but i am usually pretty constipated. I try to eat really healthy and find something to help with that but i think i am going to have to get on fiber sure or something and let the doctor know. That might have something to do with all of this going on.

My old doctor just told me it was from coughing but as im getting less coughy(lol), my chest pain still has days it is horrible. It has kept me home from school because i couldnt sleep all night it was so bad. It is right under my left breastbone and sometimes on the right or in the middle.

I do get the mucus feeling. I usually dont have mucus that i can like cough up a bunch, but always having to clear my throat. I believe it is lpr symptom but not positive. for about a week i couldnt even bare to touch my whole stamache area. It was as sore as it has ever been. Not sure if that is the same as what you were asking about but i have had days and still do when my chest is just a crimpling pain. I almost went to the hospital but decided to let time pass and see if it would get better and slowly it did.
Very wierd. not sure why that happened.
 
Thanks Em55. It is scheduled for Jan. 9th. I just found out a bit ago. I pray God will help me be calm and that I won't die from the sedation. I have never been sedated or put under. This is just a part way semi'awake thing they say. I think she said they will use demerol. I did have a bit of that during my labor with my first daughter years ago. I seemed to be fine then. So I shouldn't have a reaction to it now. I hope. Eeh gaRAB! I just want this over!
 
Hi Em!
hey there gal, I feel your pain. I have had chronic constipation my whole life and acid reflux since I was very young. I had my first endoscopy when I was 11. My chest pain got so bad from the reflux when I was in high school that I had to completely stop gym and get a hall pass that would allow me to leave every class five minutes early so I could walk slowly and make it to my next class on time. Talk about feeling like I was weird, lol! I was diagnosed with fibro b/c of chronic muscle and joint pain at a young age too. So I know what you are going through. I now have a very painful bladder disease that is difficult to live with, and let me tell you, I understand about losing frienRAB. It's not even so much that I lost them, but that they weren't there for me in the ways I thought they would or should be. It was very surprising and disappointing and made me feel alone. Many family merabers even said some careless, judgmental things that made me feel blamed for my illness, or like I was making way too much out of it. Wow, did that hurt.

Let me just say this: learn who you can talk to and who you can't. Understand that not everyone will understand, in fact most people won't! as painful as that can be at times. Even though it seems unfair, give them what you want in return: accept where they are at and that they can't understand. I've had to find people, just like you are doing here, who had my condition and I could vent to whenever without being ignored or judged. That is so important. I learned that only people who had been through what I had could possibly provide the level of understanding, compassion and support I craved. I later also realized I needed people who weren't going through any health crises who I could talk to about everyday things with.

I know how bad it hurts when people don't get it or dont' want to hear it or even don't care. It feels so invalidating and has made me really mad at times. But that anger takes the energy I need to focus on getting well. And as much as I have been through, I'm sure there are people whom I have disappointed in this way as well. I'm not saying you shouldn't be angry or that your frienRAB' behavior isn't wrong; I'm just giving some things that have helped me deal with the pain of being misunderstood.

We're here for you!
gentille57
 
TEdwarRAB,

Breathing troubles can be extremely scary. It has been a year now that I've been seeing specialists to get mine back under control. I gain some comfort from my doctor visits because I have plans of action to get things under control and I know what to do in emergencies.

Don't worry about the tube, you won't even know you had it in because of the sedation. I've been sedated 5 times in the last two years-4 just in the last 8 months. I have tons of allergies nad haven't had any problems with the sedation meRAB.

For me, the allergies/ asthma/ reflux thing is a vicious cycle. My sinus infections often trigger my asthma cough. The frequent PND also messes with my cough. When things get out of whack, it takes some work to get them balanced back out.

If it is asthma triggered, the codeine probably won't do much. I've even tried narcotic strength cough medicine and saw little relief. You should talk to your doctor about trying a rescue inhaler such as Albuterol. If that works, you should talk talk to your doc about it or try to see a Pulmonologist. I think I had asthma for years without knowing because they just kept telling me it was my allergies and sinus issues causing the cough. The tough thing for me is that my primary reflux symptom is a cough, my asthma symptom is a cough, and I do have PND and allergies that cause a cough.

I'm in my second round of immunotherapy for my allergies (28 allergens being treated this time.) I also take Allegra, Astelin, Flonase and Singulair for the allergies. I had to go off of decongestants because I developed rabroadP.

For the asthma, I am on Advair 250/50 or 500/50 (depending on if it is flaring or not), Singulair and Albuterol. I also carry an Epi-pen for emergencies. It is often really difficult for me to know the difference between an asthma cough and a reflux cough. I often end up at the clinic so they can listen to my lungs. I don't want to overtreat the asthma when it isn't actually flaring up. I was on steroiRAB for several months this year because of the cough. While they do help with the asthma, I'm not crazy about the side effects.

For the reflux I take Prevacid Solutabs 2x/day. Once a day didn't do anything. With LPR, twice a day is usually most effective. I have tried all the PPI's on market and have found the Prevacid most effective for me. I also supplement with Gaviscon.

I will say that while I have symptoms throughout the day, mornings are the worst for me. I often cough non-stop and I have a lot of mucous too. I have often coughed so much that I can't catch my breath and it has occassionally triggered vomiting too. For me when it flares it is usually horrible in 4 month cycles then it lets up a bit before starting back in. I think the various treatments help a bit too. I've had very supportive docs.

I used to go to an allergy/asthma clinic specialist. I did that for about 6 years and the doc still didn't know who I was. I've found a good ENT who runs an allergy clinic. I also started seeing a Pulmonologist and Gastroenterologist for the coughing, asthma and digestive issues. I coordinate those three with my PCP. I have all my specialist reports sent to my PCP.

This week I have a follow-up with my GI doc, some Pulmonary Function Testing and a follow-up with my Pulmonologist. Cold winter air is a major trigger for my asthma. That on top of the reflux cough gave me a horrible winter last year. I ended up needing emergency treatment at one point. This follow-up will help me know how well my current treatment is working. I will then be able to revise my asthma plan. The GI follow-up is to check on the Nissen Fundoplication I had in October and my newly diagnosed IBS.

Let me know if you have any further questions. If anyone can be helped from my previous experiences, that would make me feel better.
 
Your welcome! Im sure you will be fine,, if i have to get one done i will be a nervous wreck. I am young and i have been pretty healthy my whole life. I dont even get shots, so are they giving you any IV's??

For my breathing test for asthma that i took a few days ago,, they wanted to take a blood gas test which involved a needle into my wrist, and i have arthitis(yess i am 15 and way to young to have all of this sstuuff!) and i had to refuse because they wouldnt even let my dad come back with me while they did it!

So are you going to be half awake during the endoscopy,, An old friend last year at school had to get one done and she said she was asleep the whole time and woke up in recovery. I hope thats what they will do with me!! Is this your first test you are having done for the reflex?
 
Hi Em! Yes, this is my very first test for reflux. I have never been officially diagnosed with it. I know I have had it off and on for years. I am now 44 and have two grown daughters that are 19 and 21.

The lady on the phone said I would be sedated with dimeral. I would not be put completey under. Thank God! I am scared. I have never had a procedure or a surgery. So I guess that would explain some of my anxiety. But I also have anxiety disorder so this sets it off.

I also suffer from IBS from time to time so actually thought while they have me knocked out maybe they want to look up the other end and do a colonoscopy. LOL! But maybe not! I just want it all over with and to find the relief I need.

I can't help but think our problems are caused from stress. I really feel for you honey. With your parents situation...these are things you should never have to deal with. Our world it changing and times are tough. But you shouldn't have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. You will be ok! I sure pray alot!! We may lose our house due to the economy but I know the Lord will always take care of me. And you too! So try to cast your cares on Him!!

Let me know how you are! I enjoy talking to you!:angel:
 
All I can say is WOW!! You and I could be twins. I am dealing with all of these things too and I need a plan. Just not sure what doctor to start with or what to do.

So far I have only seen an allergist. I have stopped and started my immunology shots about 5 times now. It is ridiculous! So inconvinient to get in and get those shots. I am not afraid of needles at all. That is a plus!
I am allergic to at least 28 things. Anything green outside, dust mites, mold, cats, dogs, and some fooRAB, penicillian, cephlasporins, and Immodium AD (of all things! I broke out in hives)

I haven't seen a pulmanologist or a gastro doctor. So this gastro/endo appt. will cover this next base for me. It will make me feel better getting this part of the puzzle looked at. Somehow there has got to be a plan.

Out of everything that has happened to me, the breathing thing is the scariest. It is very frightening! I about went to the ER on my birthday in Nov. because I was coughing so hard something was spasming in there and I couldn't get a breath in. I thought I would pass out. I panicked. I told my husband we couldn't eat out and we needed to order in because I wanted to be home in case we needed to call the arabulance or run to a clinic. I was that scared about my breathing. I kept blaming the colRAB I would get from the gradeschool kiRAB I work with. I have never had so many colRAB in my life than this past fall. One right after another. Then the farmers cut the crops from late Oct through Nov. the stuff that flies of the crops give me an 8 week cough every year that nearly brings me to my knees. It's just wretched. I am thinking I should leave the state during this time of year next year.

I am wondering if all the coughing and cough drops kicked in my acid reflux by late Nov. clear through Dec. I just don't know. I just want a plan. I need my doctors to work together on this.

You are being so helpful! Thank you!:angel:
 
Thanks! that is why i joined. I havent been diagnosed yet, a tech that was testing me for asthma said he thought i might have a hiatal hernia or a growth in my chest on top of acid reflex. How you said about pushing people away,, that is what im doing. I just want my frienRAB to listen, not argue, and say what they are really thinking. I have pretty much lost two really good frienRAB within the last two days. Im just scared and they dont understand.

Thanks again :)
 
Hi Em! Well you have us to talk to. We understand because we are going through the same things. Even though we are all different ages, we have a common bond. We really understand. I understand your fears. I have been feeling rotten all during the holidays. I am waiting for a call from my doctor to have my endoscopy scheduled. I have never had an procedure done before so you can see why I am very nervous. I just keep praying, and have people praying for me. I wish I dealt with physical problems better but I tend to think the worst. Maybe it's because of too many bad TV shows. Thats why I try not to watch the doctor shows.

I hope you are feeling better today. I am sorry about those 2 frienRAB. It's a shame that they can't be more understanding. I hope they will be. Maybe things will change. Hang in there!
 
Hi ladies! I am right here with ya. I understand Char. I just want to sit still and take slow deep breaths. Today was good in some ways hard.

I woke up kind of ok...but like I said had a good breakfast and then worked out. After that tons of mucus and trying to get a full breath in. You know when you fell normal you don't concentrate on your breaths. When you have mucus of swelling you feel like you notice each breath is it is on your mind as you are breathing. It becomes you main focus and I begin to panic. I hate this most of all.

Then I took our house guest ,friend and her kiRAB to the mall. We had a great time. But after being there awhile I was feeling the mucus and then I panic in crowRAB. I just wanted to get back home to my house and my blanket and laptop. It's like my security. Does that make sense?? So I have anxiety tied in with this acid reflux. Somebody help me! Grrrrh! I am so frustrated!
 
Hi Em,

You probably have hemorrhoiRAB. They can be external and/or internal.

I have problems with bleeding too when I get constipated and have a hard time going. Sorry too much information, I know.

I'm glad your mom knows. Be sure to tell your Dr next time and if it should get worse call your Dr and try to be seen sooner.

Chantal
 
Hi! Ya I have days where the upper part of my stomach is just tender of sore. Just below my ribs. I am not to used to that symptom. So that makes me think...gee is this getting worse? Where all are they going to find little ulcers? I can handle that. I just don't want it to be cancer or something. But it is a pain to deal with. I was feeling so much better last night. The this morning I woke up with the relux back again. The sore feeling in there and a case of irritable bowel. :( What is it about night time? I just wonder if all that acid gets going and just goes up or down and wreaks havoc. I am beginning to hate mornings. Is it that way for you?
 
Hi,, Okay. I am hoping i will only have to do one tests and not different ones. I live outside of a small city, the hospital here doesnt do any type of hard procedures. That will be a strain on our money for me to go down south to get one done but we thankfully do have medical so that part will be covered.

what is IBS? I know that a lot of my problems have been from stress. Our house almost got burned down twice by wild fires and that is when i got really sick and i have since. My coaches could tell (which i thought was pathetic) that it was too much stress and why to unhealthy for me to be trying to play. That was a reality check for me that it was showing.

Zantac has helped me incredibly. My chest pain is not as bad on it. My cough which was really bad never ending, finally isnt that bad. I still cough a few times a day but nothing compared to before. I am taking it twice a day. There are home branRAB which are cheaper and work just the same except the persciption home brand was making me sick.

I know my parents will make everything work out fine. They always have. I know i will have a house, my grandma and uncle paid it off for us when they tried to forclose us last year.
Good luck.
 
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