Simply pull off the plastic cover under the steering wheel, exposing several wires. 'You need to use all these wires to get the car going,' Don't rush, you could still be gone in 60 seconds. 'Firstly, you need to get the ignition on. Touch the two matching red wires together,'
'If you're successful the dash will light up.' Now the ignition's on, you can power up the starter motor. Crossing the brown lead with the reds should crank over and kick off the engine. You're in business. You did check it wasn't in gear didn't you? No?
Then you'd better remove your head from a steering wheel'. Now rev it up, taking care not to stall - you've had enough of wires - engage gear and drive off without looking guilty. After all, it's your car so you should have nothing to worry about. Right?