C
Cherry Keri
Guest
I am an 11 year old and love reading. My education level is 7th grade. I also love writing. My teacher said I should be an author. this is actually the publication I am going to send to Dorrance Publishing (they accepted my manuscript). I was also accepted into the Stone Soup story magazine. I would like to know whether this writing is good or not... i accept negative and positive criticism. I will use it to make my writing better. be honest pls... also email me if you'd like first chapters of my other "in waiting" books... thnx
Here it is...
by Cherry Keri
Soon enough, I look up and I see a dark sky full of bright, yellow stars. Again, like the last dream, they slide into a star clump. The star clump bursts and shows a place. Malevolin. Suddenly another star clump forms with stars that weren’t there seconds ago. It is the planet Earth. The bright constellations stay there for 10 seconds and all of a sudden, Earth blows up. But this time, there is more. Everything starts to spin, almost like it was traveling in time. I recognize the sky of what was 18 years ago. I was eleven then, and I was interested into astrology and the constellations. I can still name all of them: Orion, The Big Dipper, The Little Dipper, Aquila, Andromeda, Cassiopeaia. Voices interrupt my naming of the constellations that formed in the bright sky. I listen closer and hear the voices louder and more distinctly. I hear 2 male voices and 3 female voices. I cannot see where they are, I only hear what they are saying. 1 man and 2 women are proposing that the Earth will eventually blow up. The other man and other woman are shouting that it’s preposterous. The team that believes Earth will blow up explain that the planet Medusa had been there over 10,000 years and just blew up a few months ago. I listened and heard that reporters and government had told everyone it was a supernova. But that wasn’t true, according to the astronomers. They said that Earth was nearing 10,000 years as well. And that we had to create safe haven that wouldn’t be affected when the Earth blew up. They told the other man and woman that when Earth blew up, that would be the end of life on Earth, living people. The man and woman who still believed that Earth wouldn’t blow up, suddenly walked out. Stormed, actually, by the way their footsteps sounded. I could tell by the sighs I heard, the team of the man and two women, had given up on their theory. I remembered this clearer and more clearer and this came back to me.
I remembered that my dad, my mom, and my aunt were the ones that believed Earth would blow up. I remember them telling me that we had to create a safe haven quick and fast. That’s how they left me. They made me pack my bags and all my toys. We drove our van to a place that was neutral within the Earth’s atmosphere. That place would never get affected by whatever Earth got affected by. They never told me where they were going. For weeks, my dad, my mom, and my aunt, sat on logs, and drew out all the plans for their new safe haven. 8 years later, they were still building. It seemed like they didn’t care about me. All the clothes I brought had out-grew me, all the games and toys I brought soon didn’t suit my interest. I sat there in the heat all day, lying on the ground. I was now 19. I really wanted to finish school, and go to college, and be an astronomer, like my dad, my mom, and my aunt. But I never got the education I needed to go to college. I was angry at my family for dragging me along with them. They never accomplished anything, in my point of view. I remember that they asked me to help them finish up the last touches. They said I could design the inside with pink walls and white polka dots. I stormed over to them, kicking up a lot of sand and dirt on my way over. I yelled in their faces, “Mom, Dad, Aunt Jenny, if haven’t you noticed, I’m not the same little girl that you brought here. I was 11, I’m 19 now. I’m not the same. Don’t you notice that I’ve been bored for the last 8 years, watching you build nothing!!” They told me calmly that they now wanted me to help them, I was old enough now. But I was stubborn. They were all up on ladders, on the inside of the four wall structure. One of the walls wasn’t built yet, so I could still see them from the outside. I yelled at them, “I don’t care anymore. I never did. You made me come here. Yet you never accomplished anything. I hate you for doing that. I could’ve lived a normal life, live the life that I wanted to live. But no, you had to drag me along to watch you build nothing.” I turned and stomped away. All of a sudden, I heard a rumble. The structure that had been standing a few seconds ago, had now been crumbled to the floor. I turned around to face it. I ran to my family. I could feel my eyes stinging with tears as I ran over. I struggled to lift up the huge pieces of wood as I tried to uncover my dad, my mom, and my Aunt Jenny. I could feel my face wet with tears of guilt. My parents an
Here it is...
by Cherry Keri
Soon enough, I look up and I see a dark sky full of bright, yellow stars. Again, like the last dream, they slide into a star clump. The star clump bursts and shows a place. Malevolin. Suddenly another star clump forms with stars that weren’t there seconds ago. It is the planet Earth. The bright constellations stay there for 10 seconds and all of a sudden, Earth blows up. But this time, there is more. Everything starts to spin, almost like it was traveling in time. I recognize the sky of what was 18 years ago. I was eleven then, and I was interested into astrology and the constellations. I can still name all of them: Orion, The Big Dipper, The Little Dipper, Aquila, Andromeda, Cassiopeaia. Voices interrupt my naming of the constellations that formed in the bright sky. I listen closer and hear the voices louder and more distinctly. I hear 2 male voices and 3 female voices. I cannot see where they are, I only hear what they are saying. 1 man and 2 women are proposing that the Earth will eventually blow up. The other man and other woman are shouting that it’s preposterous. The team that believes Earth will blow up explain that the planet Medusa had been there over 10,000 years and just blew up a few months ago. I listened and heard that reporters and government had told everyone it was a supernova. But that wasn’t true, according to the astronomers. They said that Earth was nearing 10,000 years as well. And that we had to create safe haven that wouldn’t be affected when the Earth blew up. They told the other man and woman that when Earth blew up, that would be the end of life on Earth, living people. The man and woman who still believed that Earth wouldn’t blow up, suddenly walked out. Stormed, actually, by the way their footsteps sounded. I could tell by the sighs I heard, the team of the man and two women, had given up on their theory. I remembered this clearer and more clearer and this came back to me.
I remembered that my dad, my mom, and my aunt were the ones that believed Earth would blow up. I remember them telling me that we had to create a safe haven quick and fast. That’s how they left me. They made me pack my bags and all my toys. We drove our van to a place that was neutral within the Earth’s atmosphere. That place would never get affected by whatever Earth got affected by. They never told me where they were going. For weeks, my dad, my mom, and my aunt, sat on logs, and drew out all the plans for their new safe haven. 8 years later, they were still building. It seemed like they didn’t care about me. All the clothes I brought had out-grew me, all the games and toys I brought soon didn’t suit my interest. I sat there in the heat all day, lying on the ground. I was now 19. I really wanted to finish school, and go to college, and be an astronomer, like my dad, my mom, and my aunt. But I never got the education I needed to go to college. I was angry at my family for dragging me along with them. They never accomplished anything, in my point of view. I remember that they asked me to help them finish up the last touches. They said I could design the inside with pink walls and white polka dots. I stormed over to them, kicking up a lot of sand and dirt on my way over. I yelled in their faces, “Mom, Dad, Aunt Jenny, if haven’t you noticed, I’m not the same little girl that you brought here. I was 11, I’m 19 now. I’m not the same. Don’t you notice that I’ve been bored for the last 8 years, watching you build nothing!!” They told me calmly that they now wanted me to help them, I was old enough now. But I was stubborn. They were all up on ladders, on the inside of the four wall structure. One of the walls wasn’t built yet, so I could still see them from the outside. I yelled at them, “I don’t care anymore. I never did. You made me come here. Yet you never accomplished anything. I hate you for doing that. I could’ve lived a normal life, live the life that I wanted to live. But no, you had to drag me along to watch you build nothing.” I turned and stomped away. All of a sudden, I heard a rumble. The structure that had been standing a few seconds ago, had now been crumbled to the floor. I turned around to face it. I ran to my family. I could feel my eyes stinging with tears as I ran over. I struggled to lift up the huge pieces of wood as I tried to uncover my dad, my mom, and my Aunt Jenny. I could feel my face wet with tears of guilt. My parents an