There are some threads about this somewhere else on this forum. To get the right keyboard configuration, you have to use a program called Nemesis (I think) before hand and write the correct firmware code onto your phone's memory. Then when you use the Nokia Software Updater it will detect that code, and install the proper firmware that matches your keyboard, during the upgrade.
From that point on, any future firmware updates should all continue to work correctly and you should always get the right keypad layout. You only have to do the Nemesis thing once.