C
Cuggy Munt
Guest
Three old men are sitting around chatting about their respective toilet habits. ‘The best thing that could happen to me,’ says the 80 year-old, ‘would just to be able to have a good pee. I stand there for 20 minutes, and it dribbles and hurts. I have to go over and over again.’ The 85-year-old nods in agreement. ‘The best thing that could happen to me,’ he laments, ‘Is if I could have one good bowel movement. I take every kind of laxative I can get my hands on and it's still a problem.’ But the 90 year-old is shaking his head. ‘That's not my problem,’ he says. ‘Every morning at 6:00am sharp, I have a good long slash. And then at 6:30am sharp I usually crimp off a length too.’ ‘So what's the problem?’ chorus the others. ‘Well,’ says the pensioner, ‘The best thing that could happen to me would be if I could wake up before 7:00am.’