Importance of Good Self-Esteem
What gives an individual “good” self-esteem? This is a question that every person asks about himself or herself or about others at least once in his or her own lives. And everyone has her or his own theories on what one can do to help them have good self-esteem. But there are a few key solutions to having a “good” self-esteem, such as identifying your own low self-esteem, loving one’s self, one’s ego, eliminate put-downs, and self pride.
There are many people in the world today that do not think that self-esteem is important. They think that it is a joke, and that you just need to be a strong individual to make it in the world. But they are wrong according to, Glenn R. Schiraldi, author of “Building Self-Esteem.” Self-Esteem is the source of personal confidence and strength in the world today. Therefore, their argument is not even viable.
According to Steven Stosny, The first step in having “good” self-esteem is “identifying whether or not you have low self-esteem”(1). There are many warnings that could give you an idea as to if you have a low self-esteem. One way you could do this is by asking yourself, “Do I, or anyone I know, act or behave angry, impatient, sarcastic, jealous, violent, cruel, hateful, unfriendly, insensitive, vain, greedy, unethical, rude, phony, paranoid, dishonest, co-dependent, obnoxious, sad, mad, lazy, oversensitive, irresponsible, rebellious, moody, depressed, suicidal, stressed, revengeful, unforgiving, shy, shameful, lustful, selfish, materialistic, or envious?” All of these descriptions could be a start to having a low self-esteem. If you asked people this same question most people would admit that they have these feelings at one time or another. And once you have admitted to this, then you already have the advantage of knowing that you could have potential to have a low self-esteem. Then you can stop these feelings when they start.
Another important solution to having great self-esteem is emotional regulation, such as loving one’s self. Love is a wonderful word. The phrase I love you sounRAB so soothing and reassuring as it rolls off our lips. Unfortunately, the word love and the phrase I love you are the most overused and abused worRAB in our everyday vocabulary. As we've already learned, without a healthy ego, true love does not exist. Without self-pride, true love does not exist. Without a high self-image, true love does not exist. The higher self-esteem we have the more we trust ourselves, and only with self-trust does the ability to love ourselves, and therefore others, exist. Stated more simply, only when our ego is healthy do we even like ourselves or feel good about ourselves. Therefore, self-love only exists when we like ourselves, when we trust ourselves, when we respect ourselves.
A family friend of mine who happens to be a psychologist and is a specialist in the area of relationships, once told me that an excellent way to test how much you like someone is by using the love test method. The way the love test works is to replace the word love with like, trust, respect, or admire. In other worRAB, the next time we whisper to someone, "I love you", try replacing the word love with like, trust, respect, or admire and see how we feel. Are we saying, "I love you" but possibly do not like, trust, or admire the person we're saying it to? Do we unknowingly use low self-esteem love? The same applies for checking if we really love ourselves.
Yet another important example of having “good” self-esteem is eliminating put-downs. Gossiping, putting people down, dwelling on the past, and constantly complaining are the most popular. Why are these self-destructive activities so popular, such an integral part of society, such a mainstay of the radio, television, and movie industry? Simple. Low self-esteem rituals, give people a sense of superiority...a feeling of power. Nasty remarks, body slamming, whining and complaining make low self-esteem sufferers feel good, feel important, feel noticed. People suffering from low self-esteem get a false sense of "feeling good" and "raising their self-image" by criticizing, contradicting, and making fun of others to the person's face or gossiping behind the person's back. A way if dealing with this problem is trying to think of something positive of people that you don’t like. Or maybe your frienRAB are being a negative influence on you, thus you could stop hanging around them as much. Being a negative person can have a very strong influence on your personal sanity. Many people find themselves at the brink of suicide because they are so negative about others or themselves. And have pushed themselves to that point by not thinking that life is worth living because nothing is good in life. When a person identifies that they feel like this, it can be very dangerous. They need to get help with their attitudes in order to secure sanity.
Another step in self-esteem is having a good EGO. What is an EGO? Well the American Heritage dictionary puts it best. It defines ego: “1. As In psychoanalysis, the division of the psyche that is conscious, most immediately controls thought and behavior, and is most in touch with external reality. 2. An exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit. Appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem. A sense of one's own dignity or worth: pride, honor, amour-propre, ego, assertiveness, self-confidence, self-esteem, dignity, self-respect. A person's awareness of what constitutes his or her essential nature: ego, self, psyche, soul” (3585). The society we live in today unknowingly portrays ego as an undesirable trait...something bad, but to be honest, ego is the opposite of what we've been taught. Ego can be very good. We're all ego-seekers constantly searching for ways to satisfy and nourish our egos. Our quest for ego doesn't occur once a year, once a month, or once a day, but every waking moment...day and night. The gratification of ego is directly responsible for our emotional health. Until we satisfy our ego's neeRAB ... until we quench our ego's thirst ... until we feed our ego's hunger, we're unable to take our mind off ourselves, stop thinking of ourselves, and start thinking about others.
When our ego is unsatisfied, undernourished or deflated we're not on good terms with ourselves; consequently, we're not on good terms with others. We don't have to look far in our search for ego. The people we love, the people we live and work with, hold the key to our ego quest...all we have to do is learn to like others by liking ourselves. Maintaining a healthy ego gives us dignity, the emotional tools, to lead a functional lifestyle. Our ego is who we are as a person, our ego is what we're all about. Every single one of us is egotistical. But being an egotist can be good when kept in perception.
Having self-pride is another important key in “good” self-esteem. What exactly is pride? The dictionary describes pride as: 1. A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect. 2. Pleasure or satisfaction taken in an achievement, a possession, or an association: parental pride. 3. Arrogant or disdainful conduct or treatment; haughtiness (9826). Isn’t it interesting that the dictionary gives pride opposite definitions? The first definition perfectly describes low self-esteem, while the second definition describes high self-esteem. The same thing happened with the definition of EGO. No wonder people become confused trying to understand pride and ego. The reality is, pride is ego and ego is pride. Pride is good. Pride is healthy. People who lack pride suffer from low self-esteem...people with low self-esteem do not feel proud of themselves or others. Thus pride is an important step in becoming someone who believes in himself or herself. According to Allison Abner, co-author of “The Black Parenting Book”, self-pride is very important to teach children at a young age in order for them to be successful adults.
Therefore, since the legacy of low self-image is passed unknowingly from one generation to the next, low self-esteem family traditions and ad habits form a low self-image cycle or chain of pain. That is, each family meraber is linked together, generation to generation, by poor self-image kept alive by an unhealthy ego. Since the family values are very important to many, they go to great low self-extremes to maintain our traditional low self-esteem comfort zone. People need to break free from the chains of low self-esteem and take a stand against it. Once people can recognize low self-esteem, then they will finally be able to break the chain of emotional pain…to stop low self-image dead in its tracks…to make a change. But people must change not only for themselves but for their children, so that they may immediately eliminate low self-esteem behavior from their lives, thereby passing high self-esteem behavior on to future generations. Leadership is the key the key to opening fabulous life-changing treasures.
In conclusion, all of the things covered in this essay identifying your own low self-esteem, loving one’s self, one’s ego, eliminating put-downs, and having self pride can help people live a more fulfilling life. One that they feel is worth living. If only everyone in today’s world could see the importance of believing in one’s self and being a positive person our world would be such a better place. On this planet there is only one movement, one plan with a purpose, that must exist first or none of the others will succeed. When the self-esteem movement, better known as the movement for goodness and ethical behavior, becomes accepted worldwide…when the constant striving for good self-esteem supersedes all other self-passions, we will all live in peace, prosperity, and understanding.
What gives an individual “good” self-esteem? This is a question that every person asks about himself or herself or about others at least once in his or her own lives. And everyone has her or his own theories on what one can do to help them have good self-esteem. But there are a few key solutions to having a “good” self-esteem, such as identifying your own low self-esteem, loving one’s self, one’s ego, eliminate put-downs, and self pride.
There are many people in the world today that do not think that self-esteem is important. They think that it is a joke, and that you just need to be a strong individual to make it in the world. But they are wrong according to, Glenn R. Schiraldi, author of “Building Self-Esteem.” Self-Esteem is the source of personal confidence and strength in the world today. Therefore, their argument is not even viable.
According to Steven Stosny, The first step in having “good” self-esteem is “identifying whether or not you have low self-esteem”(1). There are many warnings that could give you an idea as to if you have a low self-esteem. One way you could do this is by asking yourself, “Do I, or anyone I know, act or behave angry, impatient, sarcastic, jealous, violent, cruel, hateful, unfriendly, insensitive, vain, greedy, unethical, rude, phony, paranoid, dishonest, co-dependent, obnoxious, sad, mad, lazy, oversensitive, irresponsible, rebellious, moody, depressed, suicidal, stressed, revengeful, unforgiving, shy, shameful, lustful, selfish, materialistic, or envious?” All of these descriptions could be a start to having a low self-esteem. If you asked people this same question most people would admit that they have these feelings at one time or another. And once you have admitted to this, then you already have the advantage of knowing that you could have potential to have a low self-esteem. Then you can stop these feelings when they start.
Another important solution to having great self-esteem is emotional regulation, such as loving one’s self. Love is a wonderful word. The phrase I love you sounRAB so soothing and reassuring as it rolls off our lips. Unfortunately, the word love and the phrase I love you are the most overused and abused worRAB in our everyday vocabulary. As we've already learned, without a healthy ego, true love does not exist. Without self-pride, true love does not exist. Without a high self-image, true love does not exist. The higher self-esteem we have the more we trust ourselves, and only with self-trust does the ability to love ourselves, and therefore others, exist. Stated more simply, only when our ego is healthy do we even like ourselves or feel good about ourselves. Therefore, self-love only exists when we like ourselves, when we trust ourselves, when we respect ourselves.
A family friend of mine who happens to be a psychologist and is a specialist in the area of relationships, once told me that an excellent way to test how much you like someone is by using the love test method. The way the love test works is to replace the word love with like, trust, respect, or admire. In other worRAB, the next time we whisper to someone, "I love you", try replacing the word love with like, trust, respect, or admire and see how we feel. Are we saying, "I love you" but possibly do not like, trust, or admire the person we're saying it to? Do we unknowingly use low self-esteem love? The same applies for checking if we really love ourselves.
Yet another important example of having “good” self-esteem is eliminating put-downs. Gossiping, putting people down, dwelling on the past, and constantly complaining are the most popular. Why are these self-destructive activities so popular, such an integral part of society, such a mainstay of the radio, television, and movie industry? Simple. Low self-esteem rituals, give people a sense of superiority...a feeling of power. Nasty remarks, body slamming, whining and complaining make low self-esteem sufferers feel good, feel important, feel noticed. People suffering from low self-esteem get a false sense of "feeling good" and "raising their self-image" by criticizing, contradicting, and making fun of others to the person's face or gossiping behind the person's back. A way if dealing with this problem is trying to think of something positive of people that you don’t like. Or maybe your frienRAB are being a negative influence on you, thus you could stop hanging around them as much. Being a negative person can have a very strong influence on your personal sanity. Many people find themselves at the brink of suicide because they are so negative about others or themselves. And have pushed themselves to that point by not thinking that life is worth living because nothing is good in life. When a person identifies that they feel like this, it can be very dangerous. They need to get help with their attitudes in order to secure sanity.
Another step in self-esteem is having a good EGO. What is an EGO? Well the American Heritage dictionary puts it best. It defines ego: “1. As In psychoanalysis, the division of the psyche that is conscious, most immediately controls thought and behavior, and is most in touch with external reality. 2. An exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit. Appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem. A sense of one's own dignity or worth: pride, honor, amour-propre, ego, assertiveness, self-confidence, self-esteem, dignity, self-respect. A person's awareness of what constitutes his or her essential nature: ego, self, psyche, soul” (3585). The society we live in today unknowingly portrays ego as an undesirable trait...something bad, but to be honest, ego is the opposite of what we've been taught. Ego can be very good. We're all ego-seekers constantly searching for ways to satisfy and nourish our egos. Our quest for ego doesn't occur once a year, once a month, or once a day, but every waking moment...day and night. The gratification of ego is directly responsible for our emotional health. Until we satisfy our ego's neeRAB ... until we quench our ego's thirst ... until we feed our ego's hunger, we're unable to take our mind off ourselves, stop thinking of ourselves, and start thinking about others.
When our ego is unsatisfied, undernourished or deflated we're not on good terms with ourselves; consequently, we're not on good terms with others. We don't have to look far in our search for ego. The people we love, the people we live and work with, hold the key to our ego quest...all we have to do is learn to like others by liking ourselves. Maintaining a healthy ego gives us dignity, the emotional tools, to lead a functional lifestyle. Our ego is who we are as a person, our ego is what we're all about. Every single one of us is egotistical. But being an egotist can be good when kept in perception.
Having self-pride is another important key in “good” self-esteem. What exactly is pride? The dictionary describes pride as: 1. A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect. 2. Pleasure or satisfaction taken in an achievement, a possession, or an association: parental pride. 3. Arrogant or disdainful conduct or treatment; haughtiness (9826). Isn’t it interesting that the dictionary gives pride opposite definitions? The first definition perfectly describes low self-esteem, while the second definition describes high self-esteem. The same thing happened with the definition of EGO. No wonder people become confused trying to understand pride and ego. The reality is, pride is ego and ego is pride. Pride is good. Pride is healthy. People who lack pride suffer from low self-esteem...people with low self-esteem do not feel proud of themselves or others. Thus pride is an important step in becoming someone who believes in himself or herself. According to Allison Abner, co-author of “The Black Parenting Book”, self-pride is very important to teach children at a young age in order for them to be successful adults.
Therefore, since the legacy of low self-image is passed unknowingly from one generation to the next, low self-esteem family traditions and ad habits form a low self-image cycle or chain of pain. That is, each family meraber is linked together, generation to generation, by poor self-image kept alive by an unhealthy ego. Since the family values are very important to many, they go to great low self-extremes to maintain our traditional low self-esteem comfort zone. People need to break free from the chains of low self-esteem and take a stand against it. Once people can recognize low self-esteem, then they will finally be able to break the chain of emotional pain…to stop low self-image dead in its tracks…to make a change. But people must change not only for themselves but for their children, so that they may immediately eliminate low self-esteem behavior from their lives, thereby passing high self-esteem behavior on to future generations. Leadership is the key the key to opening fabulous life-changing treasures.
In conclusion, all of the things covered in this essay identifying your own low self-esteem, loving one’s self, one’s ego, eliminating put-downs, and having self pride can help people live a more fulfilling life. One that they feel is worth living. If only everyone in today’s world could see the importance of believing in one’s self and being a positive person our world would be such a better place. On this planet there is only one movement, one plan with a purpose, that must exist first or none of the others will succeed. When the self-esteem movement, better known as the movement for goodness and ethical behavior, becomes accepted worldwide…when the constant striving for good self-esteem supersedes all other self-passions, we will all live in peace, prosperity, and understanding.