celtic girl
New member
I'm a senior in high school right now, and it just seems like everything's against me, like everything is always an uphill battle that I just don't see the point of anymore.
I've played soccer all my life; I just finished my final season and I know that it's the last time I ever play. I miss it so much already. I got rejected from my first choice college and the other two that admitted me are probably going to rescind their admission because I got a D the first half of my senior year, so my dream of a four year is gone. I had plans to improve my grades for this term but everything got even harder and I'm still doing poorly. I stress so much about it I feel sick...then I have mom constantly reminding me that I'm not going to college because she won't pay for it because I haven't proved to her that I can work hard and pull off good grades. Either that, or she's telling me that they're going to take my acceptance away.
I used to love to write; now I feel like everything I come up with is complete and utter crap. At school I feel worthless because I feel like I have nothing to offer my friends, no good qualities or anything I can help them with. I have no motivation to do anything. For a recent scholarship essay, I was asked to write about how I will achieve my goals....and I realized I don't have any goals, a fact I found almost depressing. Nothing I do holds any entertainment for me anymore. I'm just...bored. Empty. I don't see the point of stressing continually so I can be bored.
I don't know what to do. I know this sounded like one big complaint and that I should just get over it, but I truly feel helpless.
I've played soccer all my life; I just finished my final season and I know that it's the last time I ever play. I miss it so much already. I got rejected from my first choice college and the other two that admitted me are probably going to rescind their admission because I got a D the first half of my senior year, so my dream of a four year is gone. I had plans to improve my grades for this term but everything got even harder and I'm still doing poorly. I stress so much about it I feel sick...then I have mom constantly reminding me that I'm not going to college because she won't pay for it because I haven't proved to her that I can work hard and pull off good grades. Either that, or she's telling me that they're going to take my acceptance away.
I used to love to write; now I feel like everything I come up with is complete and utter crap. At school I feel worthless because I feel like I have nothing to offer my friends, no good qualities or anything I can help them with. I have no motivation to do anything. For a recent scholarship essay, I was asked to write about how I will achieve my goals....and I realized I don't have any goals, a fact I found almost depressing. Nothing I do holds any entertainment for me anymore. I'm just...bored. Empty. I don't see the point of stressing continually so I can be bored.
I don't know what to do. I know this sounded like one big complaint and that I should just get over it, but I truly feel helpless.