I'm applying to a Math and Science camp, can someone read my personal...

  • Thread starter Thread starter MokyMoky
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MokyMoky

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...statement and tell me if it's ok? please? The first time I went to the beach was when I was 7 years old, yet I remember it like it was yesterday. The sound the waves created; crashing, rolling over cliffs, left me in awe. The ocean is the most beautiful, mysterious thing I have ever laid eyes on. And from that moment on, I knew that the only career I would truly be happy with would be Marine Biology. That is one reason why, I have always tried my hardest to join every opportunity for involvement in science.
My personal goal is to get a bachelors degree at Oregon State University in Marine Science. Upward Bound has been a huge help with this, and will in the future as well, because I use the tutors for science homework, and many other subjects. Upward Bound also helps me understand the responsibilities and working conditions of the career I want to pursue. With this help I am able to get excelling grades and maintain them; I wish to maintain a GPA of 4.00 throughout all of high school and college. With Math Science Upward Bound Regional Center (MSUB), I would be able to look at and learn information one must know and use to be a Marine Biologist, because Science and Math are so important when learning marine biology! I know that MSUB would help me learn more, and because it is in Santa Cruz, it will let me see, and get acquainted with-through trips to the ocean and classes -the powerful ocean that I so yearn to help, to save, and see the life in.
I am very determined and am going to make sure I get much higher 10th grade benchmark scores in math and science, because fulfilling my personal goals are so important to me. I will try my hardest to get high grades and to actually learn the information in front of me, instead of just memorizing it for a test and then forgetting it. I hope to become more intelligent, and only to improve my grades and outlook on life on my journey to become a marine biologist. I wish to work at a marine wildlife preserve-because I am concerned with the protection of marine mammals that are on the endangered list. Science and Math truly fascinate me so I really hope that I will get into this camp-this amazing opportunity. I do hope that one day, in the future, I can go to Santa Cruz and remember it as the place where I had a wonderful experience learning new things that helped me reach my goals and become a marine biologist. \

Thank you in advance for the help! (p.s. im in 9th grade and am taking 10th grade classes and got scores on the state tests that were not meeting-hence the mention of higher scores in benchmark testing.) :D thanks again!
 
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