I'm a new poet, trying to get off to a strong start?

E

Eric Holthus

New member
Please go easy with the comments, this is just off the top of my head

Title: The invisible crush

For years it seems that I have been invisible

Because if you knew me I would be visible

When I see her my heart gets butterflies

When she smiles her teeth leads me to her eyes

Her eyes are like fireflies that never burn out

Therefore whenever I see you I have no doubt

That we are meant to be

For our hearts are an endless sea

If it wasn't for you I would be dead

With a self inflicted wound to the head

Don't let this scare you, it's simply passion

Perhaps in the past it was a smaller ration

We shall be one until our days are done

For our love burns greater than the sun
 
I think it's a very good poem, I understand what it's like to be new at this but I think it's very good. You will get better but for now this is very good and shows potential. Like it!!!
 
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